I review the rest of February and the beginning of March!

Omg guess what guys!? I’m finally back to talk to you about everyone’s favorite death eater leader Lord Voldemort aka Taylor Alison Swift. Today in her death eater adventures, I’m gonna talk about how her fellow death eaters have been name dropping her left and right. From Nagini aka Camila the cunt to Peter Pettigew aka Lena the Lard Dunham. Also, Ed Ugly Sheeran decided to unnecessarily name drop his boss in various interviews and Uncle Creepy aka Tommy Girl Hiddleston has been getting a lot of questions about his ex-beard (surprise, surprise). Let me tell you all about it:

giphy.gif

Before his awful Grammy performance, Ed decided to name drop Tay omfg lol how pathetic:

The 27-year-old singer’s close friend and former collaborator Ed Sheeran has revealed the extreme measures that Taylor takes to make sure her music doesn’t get into the hands of the wrong person.

“She would never send new songs, no,” Ed said in a new interview. “I hear them but it has to be with her.”

Ed even said that Taylor has people that will fly with music in locked briefcases so that certain people can hear the songs early!
“I remember when I did a song with her for her album, I was in San Francisco and they sent someone with a locked briefcase with an iPad and one song on it and they flew to San Francisco, and played the song I’ve done with her,” Ed said. “And they asked if I like it and I was like ‘Yeah’ and then they took it back, that’s how I hear it.”

DID HE JUST SUBTLETY REFER TO HER AS A CONTROL FREAK

raw.gif

Also, how ironic that he name dropped her before his Saturday Night Live performance:

and you all know about the NBC and Universal partnership right?

url.png

IMG_2487.PNG

IMG_2488.PNG

tumblr_nvkg40HQ1Y1tfn6k7o1_500.gif

Moving on now, Frank Ocean decided to rightfully call out Tay winning over Kendrick Lamar at the Grammys last year:

Ok Ken (and David). As much as I hate to make you guys famous or even respond to you directly. We all die one day and you’re old so fuck it. Yea yea my 2013 performance at the Grammys was absolute shit. Technical difficulties, blah blah. Thanks for the reminder. Very much appreciated. Fuck that performance though. You think that’s why I kept my work out of the Grammy process this year? Don’t you think I would’ve wanted to play the show to ‘redeem’ myself if I felt that way? In reality, I actually wanted to participate in honoring Prince on the show but then I figured my best tribute to that man’s legacy would be to continue to be myself out here and to be successful. Winning a TV award doesn’t christen me successful. It took me some time to learn that. I bought all my masters back last year in the prime of my career, that’s successful. Blonde sold a million plus without a label, that’s successful. I am young, black, gifted and independent.. that’s my tribute. I’ve actually been tuning into CBS around this time of year for a while to see who gets the top honor and you know what’s really not ‘great TV’ guys? 1989 getting album of the year over To Pimp A Butterfly. Hands down one of the most ‘faulty’ TV moments I’ve seen. Believe the people. Believe the ones who’d rather watch select performances from your program on YouTube the day after because your show puts them to sleep. Use the old gramophone to actually listen bro, I’m one of the best alive. And if you’re up for a discussion about the cultural bias and general nerve damage the show you produce suffers from then I’m all for it. Have a good night.

GO FRANK OCEAN

raw.gif

Moreover, Peter Pettigrew aka Lena Dunham was paid to defend her faux friend/boss for not speaking out the 2016 Election:

“I just think everyone has to do it their way. When I was lesser known, I was like, “Who could not share their opinion?” Then I found out that when you talk about politics, people straight up tweet you the floor plan of your house and say they’re coming to your house. You have to fucking watch it because people are nuts,” Lena told Rolling Stone.

“She’s been in the public eye since she was 15. I felt young when my career started and I was 23, 24. When I met her, she was newly 22, and she was a f*cking seasoned pro at this stuff. Watching the way that she understands the vicissitudes of the cycle, and she just keeps making her work, – that’s just really impressive to me. That’s how I hope to live my life, which is not as a slave to public opinion, but just as somebody who continues to make things,” Lena continued.
“She’s truly just an artist who has to make things to survive. I guess that’s what we have most in common. And she’s never not making music. If people know about it or they don’t, she’s never not making music, and that’s like, something that I’ve really watched with a lot of admiration. Because she’s been put through the ringer, and she’s continued to make her work. People who understand how to protect themselves but aren’t so beaten down that they can’t be creative – that to me is the greatest.”

4965397.gif

Also, it’s funny how Lena got a huge hefty paycheck for defending the bitch before the film for her new movie My Entire High School Sinking Into the Sea Trailer debuted on the web a mere 5 DAYS afterwards oooh:

THIS LOOKS AWFUL AF, BUT IT’S A LENA DUNHAM FILM SO

giphy.gif

The day after Peter Pettigrew was paid to defend her boss, Nagini aka Camila the Cunt Cabello decided to name drop Tay in her Billboard Magazine interview lol oh gosh:

Cabello’s Florida friends, who all predate her appearance on The X Factor, reconnected for “Friendsgiving” in 2016 and FaceTimed an eighth-grade theater teacher who encouraged Cabello when she first got into acting and singing. She’s not much for going out: “I had a phase in Miami where I was like, ‘I’m going to do all the things I would do if I were 19,’ ” which she is. “I went [to clubs], and I was like, ‘I don’t love this.’ ” After our brunch in Los Angeles, she plans to meet Troye Sivan for coffee and then have him and Taylor Swift over to her Silver Lake Airbnb for some “chill stuff.”

OH GOSH CHILL STUFF HUH CAMILA AND YOU’RE A CELEB, WHY ARE YOU APPARENTLY “STAYING” IN AN AIRBNB HAHAHHAHAHAHAH

tumblr_njmzm1HRWA1ql5yr7o1_500.gif

Also, how hilarious that fellow SONY artist Camila the cunt name dropped her faux friend before this song came out:

MY DEAR THIS SONG SOUNDS AWFUL GOOD LUCK WITH THAT FLOP SOLO CAREER OF YOURS BITCH

26-wrong corral.gif

Also, Troye Sivan is a Capitol Records artist:

IMG_2489.PNG

And, looked what I found out about Troye lol:

IMG_2490.PNG

tumblr_nyusrqvqDo1tp2mvqo1_500.gif

Also, Troye’s Out Magazine photoshoot came out THE SAME DAY as Camila the Cunt’s interview:

troye_sivan_ali_forney_center.jpg

raw.gif

Now onto Little Big Town ughhhhhh, one of the members, Karen Fairchild decided to say Tay will always be a, “Nashville Girl at Heart”, even though Taylor was born in Pennsylvania lol:

“She’s a Nashville songwriter,” Little Big Town‘s Karen Fairchild told USA Today. “When you write a song like “Better Man” top to bottom on your own with your acoustic guitar, that’s Nashville. She’s a storyteller. She loves country music. Her last record was more poppy but who knows? Taylor can do anything she wants to. And she will forever be a Nashville girl.”

sjlKGBI.gif

Funny, how Karen name-dropped Tay before their album came out:

LBTTheBreakerAlbumCover.jpg

and also look what record label Little Big Town are a part of:

IMG_2491.PNG

giphy.gif

Furthermore, Ed decided the name drop the bitch THE DAY BEFORE HIS ALBUM CAME OUT and this is what he decided to say:

“Taylor [Swift] isn’t going to be releasing until probably the end of this year – Christmas is the smartest time to release because that’s when everyone buys records. So I’ve got a full year of just all Ed, all the time,” Ed told the BBC.

9e2d47358082b20f883e3a2698a0509e.gif

Also, he name dropped her before his awful IHeartRadio Music Awards performance a mere 2 days later lol:

tumblr_inline_n75fulZDpJ1s542ce.gif

Now onto Lorde releasing new music and how Tay made it all about herself, I mean promoted her faux friend’s single, because they’re both Universal Music Group artists my bad: Tay decided to promote Lorde’s new single Green Light by doing this:

g2g brb just gonna make up an interpretive dance to this magnificent bop for the ages ELLA I LOVE YOU

A post shared by Taylor Swift (@taylorswift) on

giphy.gif

Moving onto Uncle Creepy aka Tom Hiddleston being asked about his ex-beard lol:

Tom Hiddleston gave an interview to The Telegraph and was asked if he regretted his relationship with Taylor Swift, specifically with regards to “the publicity and gossip the romance engendered.”

The writer of the article noted that the 36-year-old “testily” responded, “What should I regret, in your mind? I would rather not talk about this if that’s alright.”

“I’m just thinking about this. Everyone is entitled to a private life. I love what I do and I dedicate myself with absolute commitment to making great art and great entertainment, and in my mind I don’t conflict the two. My work is in the public sphere and I have a private life. And those two things are separate,” he added.

EVERYONE IS ENTITLED TO A PRIVATE LIFE HUH

Ypfkaq9h_20160919203152.jpg

BECAUSE,

35AF2BE600000578-3660771-Moving_Swift_ly_Taylor_26_and_Tom_35_have_only_been_dating_for_a-a-19_1466959955643.jpg

YOU WERE SO

tom-hiddleston-style-taylor-swift.jpg

PRIVATE LAST SUMMER THOMAS

rs_634x1024-160623091920-634-Tom-Hiddleston-Taylor-Swift-Date-Nashville-J3R-062316.jpg

WITH YOUR

360E563600000578-3680114-Down_Under_Taylor_Swift_and_Tom_Hiddleston_touched_down_in_Sydne-a-69_1467944396487.jpg

RIDICULOUS SHENANIGANS

28a15beb2497ea6763edef4934e7ec5e.gif

Moreover, today Ed decided to tell the world in Rolling Stone that he not only slept with one of his other fellow death eaters (ewwwwww), he also talked about how he and Tay “always have each others backs”. BAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAH

On hooking up with some of Taylor Swift‘s friends: “Taylor’s world is celebrity. I was this 22-year-old awkward British kid going on tour with the biggest artist in America, who has all these famous mates. It was very easy. … I would often find myself in situations just kind of waking up and looking over and being like, ‘How the f-ck did that happen?’”

Nothing can divide them! Ed Sheeran opened up about his close bond with BFF Taylor Swift in his new Rolling Stone cover story. The British singer, who just dropped his third album, Divide, first met the pop star when he opened for her 2013 Red Tour.

“I was on the most amazing f–king tour in the world. I was just living in a country that I didn’t belong in, in a town I didn’t really know anyone,” Sheeran, 26, told the mag. “She would be there if everything ended for me. Taylor is kind of an anomaly in that sense. She’s omnipresent because she’s the most famous woman in the world, so she can’t make the decision to not be in the press. I always stick up for Taylor.”

Swift, 27, became a fan when she heard his hit “Lego House” in 2011. “It just cut through everything else,” she told RS.

“It’s awesome meeting famous people. But that’s not life. That’s not reality,” Sheeran told RS. “One day this will f–king end. And I know the one person that’s going to remain constant is Cherry (Seaborn, his girlfriend). I should just enjoy this while it’s there, but not let it become my reality. Because that’s not the reality I want to live in.”

The “Castle on the Hill” singer feels the same way about Swift, even though they only see each other once or twice a year. “We’ve gotten matching Scottish folds, made each other arts and crafts Christmas presents, vacationed with our families, and had each other’s backs,” Swift told Rolling Stone. “He is the James Taylor to my Carole King and I can’t imagine a time when he wouldn’t be.”

OKAY, IF YOU CLAIM YOU 2 “HAVE EACH OTHERS BACKS” THEN WHERE WERE YOU WHEN KIMYE ATTACKED HER LAST JULY ED? AND DON’T EVEN GET ME STARTED ON THE OTHER BULLSHIT YOU’RE SPEWING AND YOU BASICALLY ADMITTED TO JOINING HER TOUR FOR MORE EXPOSURE, DUMBASS

idjut.gif

Also, it’s funny how this interview came out THE DAY BEFORE he performed at his not so secret show in NYC lol:

01-Ed-Sheeran-performs-at-Webster-Hall-march-2017-billboard-1548.jpg

tumblr_inline_mk8c3aXmmx1qz4rgp.gif

That’s all for the misadventures of Lord Voldemort and her fellow death eaters (for now). Oh gosh, is Ed taking lying advice from Lily Aldridge or something, because it sure seems that way lol. Also, I’m really starting to think that he’s in love with Tay like dude, she’s not into guys like go back to your girlfriend and leave Tay alone, oh wait you’re barely relevant without her so lol. Also, like I said before, I still don’t feel sorry for Uncle Creepy at all like he’s the one who wanted more fame and exposure, he got it like stop being annoyed about being asked about Tay, you idiot lol. Also, Lena, I know you’re gonna fade into irrelevancy once your stupid ass show finally says goodbye, but oh gosh you defending Tay is just making you look more pathetic than you already are lol. BTW, Camila get better PR training oh gosh like Tay has ever “chilled” in her 27 years on being on this earth lmfao, nice try bitch lol. Goodbye now and I’ll be back soon kids!

de4d0147111d879b4fbdaf1b7b529d8c.gif

 

My review so far of February 2017

Hello, hello, hello. I’m back again and it feels so damn good omg. I’m back to inform you of what’s been happening with our favorite white feminist Taylor Allison Swift in the loving month of February. I’m gonna talk about her terrible Super Bowl performance, her fake friends name dropping her and her former beard Tom Hiddleston spouting lies about him and Tay’s fauxlationship, oh gosh he’s getting more embarrassing and pathetic by the minute lol. Let me tell you all about it:

pretty-little-liars-halloween-alison-smile.gif

On February 2, Tay posted a video of her rehearsing for her Super Bowl performance (thank god she didn’t take the main stage, now that would’ve been a huge disaster) and she also sang an acoustic version of her awful song I don’t wanna live forever:

SO FUCKING PITCHY OMFG

raw.gif

Moving on, on February 3rd, Tay’s fake friend and fellow Sony artist Camila Cabello aka Camila the cunt decided to name drop Tay while promoting her horrible single Bad Things:

“We talk about love a lot and if I ever have any questions about love or if there’s anything that I’m going through at the time, whether it’s with a boy or with a friend, she’s a very good person to ask those kind of questions,” Cabello told The Sun. “She’s very knowledgeable about that stuff.”

Wednesday.gif

After that lying mess, Bad Things topped the pop song charts:

Machine Gun Kelly and Camila Cabello crown Billboard‘s Pop Songs radio airplay chart with “Bad Things.” The collab climbs 2-1 on the list dated Feb. 18.

The track is the first leader (and first chart entry) for rapper Kelly. Cabello reigns in her second visit as a soloist. A year ago, she reached No. 10 with Shawn Mendes on “I Know What You Did Last Summer.”

GEEZ I WONDER HOW THAT HAPPENED?

giphy.gif

On February 4th, Tay sang for Houston (Poor Houston) for her Superbowl performance yuck:

WHAT THE HELL IS SHE DOING ON STAGE OMFG

raw.gif

Also, Ruby Rose needed a job, because she’s already had 2 flops this year and so she DJd Tay’s show lol:

rs_1024x759-170205104956-1024.ruby-rose.cm.2517.jpg

THAT FAKE SMILE OF HERS I CAN’T

giphy.gif

Moreover, during the Superbowl stuff, Former Glee star Lea Michele decided to name drop Tay lol:

“There isn’t a day that goes by that Taylor Swift music isn’t blasted in my house. Right now, her new song with Zayn … if I play it one more time, I might combust,” jokes the star. “I love her. I was just talking to Emma Roberts about her the other day and we were reading the inside of her booklet for Red, and she has this amazing little excerpt she wrote inside about different kinds of love. She’s really an amazing songwriter and her music is just the best girl music ever.”

raw.gif

After that randomness, Tay supposedly sent Lea flowers for her comments what the actual fuck lol:

taylor-swift-sends-lea-michele-flowers-note-calls-her-the-coolest.jpg

I HOPE KARLIE WON’T GET MAD AND I WONDER IF LEA AND TAY EVER TALKED ABOUT DIANNA AGRON

giphy.gif

Also, let me tell you the real reason why this all happened: Lea Michele is a Columbia Records aka Sony artist!

and you all remember who the queen bee of Sony aka RCA Records is right?

9190SywtiLL._SX355_.jpg

Beyoncesipstea.gif

Lea has also been teasing her upcoming album like anyone asked for a 2nd album from her in the 1st place:

Michele herself has been busy lately promoting her upcoming album, Places, which features some of her most personal music yet.

“[My] first record had a little bit of a heaviness to it and was obviously more of a pop-heavy record,” she explains. “For this one, I really just kind of went back to my roots and the music I grew up listening to. Where I’m at in my life right now, which is in a really happy, positive and inspired place, I wanted all of that to really reflect in my music.”

giphy.gif

Now onto Tay’s faux DUFF aka Lena Dunham name-dropping her, because her terrible show is finally ending yay and she has nothing else better to do in her so called career lol:

“I think that young woman…it’s so hard. I think about the relationships that I had in my early twenties and if they had been public, it would’ve been a disaster,” Lena said.

She added, “And also, I mean, not to repeat age-old feminist points, but it’s like you know, any male actor her age who’s going out and dating is applauded and to just have a perfectly normal amount of romantic partners but be held to impossibly high standards by the press, like it’s just an unfair and unwinnable game.”

tumblr_nyao69JkUF1qk08n1o1_500.gif

Also, the reason why Peter Pettigrew is name-dropping Lord Voldemort is because Vogue just did a 73 questionnaire video with her as well ew lol:

giphy.gif

Moving on, Tay’s fellow Sony artist and faux friend Kelsea Ballerini decided to name drop her right before it’s announced that she’s a performer at the Grammys this month omg lol:

On learning from pal Taylor Swift on handling the public: “I have been super cool with things being public. I think that’s part of being relatable. But I think I’ve had to learn to be OK with not being polished all the time. I don’t get to just share the pretty things…”

zE04a.gif

Now onto today: Uncle Creepy aka Tom Hiddleston decided to lie about his fauxlationship with Tay in GQ just so he could promote Kong Skull Island. Face it Thomas and Luke, it’s gonna flop, so just stop:

On his relationship with Taylor: “Taylor is an amazing woman. She’s generous and kind and lovely, and we had the best time. Of course it was real….So we decided to go out for dinner, we decided to travel…She’s incredible. A relationship in the limelight…A relationship always takes work. And it’s not just the limelight. It’s everything else.”

On The “I Heart T.S.” t-shirt: “The truth is, it was the Fourth of July and a public holiday and we were playing a game and I slipped and hurt my back. And I wanted to protect the graze from the sun and said, ’Does anyone have a T-shirt?’ And one of her friends said, ’I’ve got this.’ ” The friend pulled out the “I ♥ T.S.” tank top that Taylor’s friends are contractually obligated to own. “And we all laughed about it. It was a joke.” So that’s his statement on the entire relationship: an explanation of the tank top. “It was a joke,” he repeats. “Among friends.”

On the conspiracy theories that their relationship was fake: “I have to be so psychologically strong about not letting other people’s interpretations about my life affect my life. A relationship exists between two people. We will always know what it was. The narratives that are out there altogether have been extrapolated from pictures that were taken without consent or permission, with no context. Nobody had the context for that story. I’m still trying to work out a way of having a personal life and protecting it, but also without hiding. So the hardest thing is that that was a joke among friends on the Fourth of July…I just, I was surprised. I was just surprised that it got so much attention. The tank top became an emblem of this thing.”

OKAY THERE WERE 2 THINGS GOING THROUGH MY HEAD WHEN I WAS READING THIS ARTICLE IT WAS THIS:

giphy.gif

and this

tumblr_messaging_ol2t5oJ4Bh1tkgsky_250.gif

That’s it for the month of February (for now). Oh gosh, Tom just stop you’re getting worst than Zayn and that says a lot like if you’re gonna lie tell a more convincing story like why would you slide down a waterslide and play in the water if your “back was hurting”. Heck, that was even worst than the unbelievable story Cara told on Cordon lol. Gosh, Luke is a failure as a publicist, like Tom I know he’s your boyfriend and all, but fire him, you just need a new and better publicist like stat. And, him calling Tay’s fake friends, his so called, “friends” like that was just an epic fail right there lol. Well, I’ll be leaving now, but I’ll be back the next time Tay does or says something shady or just downright stupid lol. Goodbye everyone!

tumblr_nryawtTrSJ1s1f06jo1_500.gif

Recap of everything that happened in January 2017!

Good afternoon my amazing and wonderful readers. I’m finally back with a brand new post about everyone’s favorite spoiled brat Taylor Alison Swift. Today, I’m gonna recap everything that went down in January for our favorite stupid bitch from her awful music video to how our favorite white feminist decided not to march in the Women’s March (WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK TAY!? I THOUGHT YOU WERE THIS SO CALLED FEMINIST! WHAT HAPPENED!?). Let me get started on that post for y’all:

giphy.gif

On January 11th, Tay was spotted leaving the gym and she actually looked like she worked out this time, it’s a fucking miracle:

taylor-swift-wants-her-house-to-be-a-historical-landmark-01.jpg

taylor-swift-wants-her-house-to-be-a-historical-landmark-04.jpg

taylor-swift-wants-her-house-to-be-a-historical-landmark-02.jpg

OKAY, WHAT IS UP WITH HER REFUSING TO LOOK AT THE PAPS THAT SHE OBVS CALLED AND WHY IS SHE SHOWING OFF THAT UGLY ASS BAG OF HERS I THOUGHT HER CATCHPHRASE WAS THIS:

giphy.gif

SO WHICH ONE IS IT TAY!?

tumblr_o4t7xvHJEM1rx61nzo1_500.gif

Also, this was announced for the bitch ughhh:

Taylor Swift wants to turn her home into a local historical landmark!

The 27-year-old entertainer requested that her Beverly Hills home be considered by the Cultural Heritage Commission to receive the landmark status, according to the Beverly Hills Courier.

The six-bedroom, five-bath mansion formerly belonged to legendary Hollywood producer Samuel Goldwyn, who built it in 1934.

The home also features a library, card room, theatre and a guest suite with separate entrance.

Taylor, who purchased the home in 2015, is requesting the historical landmark status to make sure that the classic, historic home is preserved.

1ST A MUSEUM, A CABLE CHANNEL AND NOW THIS WHAT’S NEXT YOU WANT TO BE THE NEXT PRESIDENT TAY?

giphy.gif

Later on, Tay wished fellow Sony artist Zayn Malik a happy birthday with a tweet basically teasing the music video for their horrible song lol:

ALSO, WHAT KIND OF TEASER IS THIS LIKE I COULD TEASE A MUSIC VIDEO BETTER THAN YOU 2 BITCHES

giphy.gif

Now onto Ed news puke: Tay’s faux friend Ed Sheeran WHO SHE HASN’T SEEN SINCE JULY 2016 decided to name drop her just so he could promote his 2 new singles lol:

“There’s an underdog element to it. Taylor [Swift] was never the popular kid in school. I was never the popular kid in school. Then you get to the point when you become the most popular kid in school – and we both take it a bit too far,” he explained. Sheeran is a known Swift squad member; she even recently helped promote his new music.
“She wants to be the biggest female artist in the world and I want to be the biggest male artist in the world,” he told the magazine of their equally strong ambitions. “It also comes from always being told that you can’t do something and being like, ‘F–k you. I can.’”

WAS HE DRINKING BEFORE THIS INTERVIEW OR SOMETHING?

78312-harry-styles-are-you-drunk-gif-OlBs.gif

Speaking of fake friends, Tay’s famewhore faux friend Ruby Rose decided to name drop Tay, because she needed to promote XXX return of the Xander which ended up flopping wow we’re already in February and you’ve already had 2 flops Ruby great job Cara 2.0:

635891024736596616-1752502780_giphy.gif

Moving on now, on January 21, instead of being the great “feminist” she claims to be and walk in the Women’s March, the cunt decided to just tweet this lol:

IF YOU’RE SO PROUD TO BE A WOMAN, THEN WHY DIDN’T YOU WALK THEN LOL

3b2f3a1def74360ff7deb62ab360b401.gif

Also, boy did she get some hate for not walking omfg:

IMG_2334.PNG

IMG_2335.PNG

IMG_2336.PNG

IMG_2337.PNG

IMG_2343.PNG

tumblr_inline_nqrctk7K4b1rxa7hy_500.gif

Also, I love how her 12 year old fans keep saying she was too “famous” to march when:

AP-cher-jt-170121_31x13_1600.jpg

America-Ferrera.jpg

image.jpg

NATALIE IS PREGNANT BTW AND SHE MADE IT SO

gettyimages-632314062.jpg

celebrities-womens-march-214076-1485031663-fb.1200x627uc.jpg

WX302-1023_2016_000347_hd.jpg

womens-march-on-washington-celebrities-melissa-benoist-1.png

helen-mirren-melissa-mccarthy-d7226def-2d13-4e40-8e61-1ecac94d4a30.jpg

tumblr_nye7bwqCLz1u5351mo1_500.gif

Moreover, on January 27, the music video for I don’t wanna live forever finally debuted and my oh my was it just plain awful:

THE ONLY BRIGHT SIDE OF THE VIDEO IS THAT THEY PROVED THAT THEY HAD WORST CHEMISTRY THAN DAKOTA AND JAMIE

excitedkenneth.gif

They also released the behind the scenes video lol:

WHY DO THEIR INTERACTIONS REMIND ME OF THIS?

585eWCw.gif

mhBVqMH.gif

tumblr_m95lwxG4PN1rshsrlo41_r1_250.gif

LIKE SPOT THE DIFFERENCE PEOPLE

raw.gif

Going onto this: You guys remember Tay’s “inspiring” speech you know the one where she shaded Kanye for telling the truth , well it was used in a Grammy short film oh dear:

HOW MUCH DID TREE AND TAY PAY FOR THIS SHIT?

JYAVWj7.gif

Moving on now, Tay and Gigi finally “hungout” after not seeing each other since OCTOBER 2016:

OH GOSH IDK WHAT’S MORE AWKWARD? HOW TAY HASN’T HEARD THE SONG EVEN THOUGH IT’S BEEN ON THE RADIO SINCE DECEMBER OR HOW HIGH GIGI LOOKS LOL

tumblr_ndlaq56f161tv4k5po1_500.gif

Also, it’s funny how Gigi and Tay have finally hungout THE SAME DAY this mag comes out:

gigi-hadid-british-vogue-march-2017.jpg

raw.gif

Gigi was also paid to praise the Grammy short film with her speech. Is she Tay’s fake friend or her lap dog? Idk which is which anymore lol.

Lily also decided to be thirsty and responded to Gigi’s tweet lol how pathetic:

tumblr_mw11c3heSN1rijbg1o1_500.gif

Remember, Lily and Gigi are both Victoria’s Secret models and IMG Models as well and Lily’s new VS Campaign pics just came out:

nintchdbpict000300101397.jpg

giphy.gif

That’s it for January. Oh gosh, I’m so happy that people are calling out the bitch for not walking in the Women’s March. But, really how the hell are her fans gonna defend her after that like she’s always preaching to us about feminism and whatnot and what we should do as feminist lol. But, wow her fans defending her like that no wonder she took y’all to court and threw away your unanswered fanmail lol. But, that music video was just yikes lol. Tay’s acting makes porn stars look like Oscar winners, like she was that bad and Zayn I have no words for discount Usher, like good luck with the rest of whatever’s left of your so called music career and bearding for Gigi lol. Also, did you guys see that Itunes reduced the price of IDWLF from $1.29 to $0.69? Like, doesn’t Itunes do that 2 or maybe 3 years after a song is released not 3 MONTHS. That’s pretty sad for a Taylor Swift song man lol. Goodbye everyone and I’ll be back with the post for February okay!

large.gif

Tay’s latest hangout with Lily (Who she hasn’t seen since October) and Abigail (Oh dear) and why she really went to Missouri to perform for that fan

Good afternoon, ladies and gentleman. Nat is finally back with news about everyone’s favorite immature bitch Taylor Alison Swift. Today, I’m gonna talk about her latest hangouts with Lily and Abigail. Also, I’m gonna tell you all why she went to Missouri to perform for a fan (Hint: It has something to do with that special friend of hers. You all know who I’m talking about.) And, Reese Witherspoon name-dropped Tay yet again (Geez, for an Oscar Winning actress she’s pretty thirsty lol). Let me get that post started for ya:

tumblr_n8jjml9g0u1rhn63po1_500.gif

On December 23rd, Tay was photographed hanging out with her faux friend Lily Aldridge with an unwelcome appearance by Abigail Anderson yuck:

taylor-swift-kicks-off-christmas-celebrations-with-lily-aldridge.jpg

I LOVE HOW SHE’S HOLDING THEIR FACES SO TIGHTLY TO HER FACE LIKE THAT

this-is-awkwardd.gif

Moreover, funny how Tay and Lily are finally hanging out after not seeing each other for 2 months after this came out ON THE SAME DAY AS THE PICS OMFG:

raw.gif

Now onto more Reese news yay (not):

The bitch name-dropped Tay yet again (Surpise, surprise):

“Country music is much easier for me,” Reese said on The Today Show, talking about singing for Walk the Line. “Singing Taylor‘s song ‘Shake It Off’ was really hard. I happened to run into her while I was making the movie and I was like, ‘I have a new appreciation for how hard you work.’ She’s like, ‘Yeah, I work really hard.’”

ariana-grande-shut-up-gif.gif

BTW, YOU ALL KNOW REESE’S FILM SING CAME OUT AND IT’S A UNIVERSAL STUDIOS FILM RIGHT?

And, you all know about Taylor’s record label Big Machine Records being under the Universal Music Umbrella, right?

img_16761.png

img_0886.pngraw.gif

Moving onto the Missouri thing:

Taylor flew to Missouri to sing to a WWII Vet named Cyrus Porter:

tumblr_nbk02xnBNX1qcjdp7o1_500.gif

BTW, LET ME TELL YOU ALL THE REAL REASON FOR THIS TRIP:

You guys all know about Tay’s girlfriend I mean special friend, Karlie Kloss right?

458078216.jpg

DON’T THEY MAKE THE CUTEST COUPLE?

Anyway, Karlie was born in Chicago, but guess where she was raised?

Kloss, who was raised in St. Louis, stars in the luxury car company’s fall 2013 advertising campaign, “Untamed.” It debuted last week at Berlin’s fashion week. The Berlin edition of The Daily Front Row, the fashion industry’s guilty pleasure newspaper, featured Kloss alone on the cover with the headline: “Fashion Week begins … with Karlie.”

giphy.gif

That’s all everyone. I hope everyone had a great Christmas, Kwanza and Hanukkah! I’d also liked to take this moment to send love and kisses to Carrie Fisher and George Michaels’ families during this tragic time. May they both rest in piece. Anyway, wow Tay using a charity stunt to go and spend the holidays with your girlfriend. And, we’re supposed to be rooting for this heartless girl lol. Also, I wonder why Martha and Todrick didn’t spend time with Tay during Christmastime, since they’re both obsessed with her lol. Did they get sick of her or something like that? LOL. Moreover, goodbye everyone and I’ll be back soon to do my year of review for Tay. You guys are in for a real treat! Goodbye everyone!

kNzx1jwRSTWyIc8d12s7_JTT Santa.gif

Happy Birthday to the stupidest bitch in the world!

Good morning my amazing readers. So sorry that I couldn’t post this on December 13th, I had to take care of my precious new dog. But, I’m happy to be back, because this is gonna be a very special post. Our precious white feminist ice queen Taylor Alison Swift turned 13 I mean 27 and I’ve decided to give her my own version of the best birthday present ever! Let me wrap it up and give it to you shall I?

PXWYOeD.gif

On December 13th, Taylor Alison Swift turned 27 years old (just 3 years from 30 yikes) and paid all of her faux friends to wish her a happy birthday lol:

Happy birthday…love you mucho ❤️

A post shared by Lily (@lilydonaldson) on

IMG_2219.PNG

IMG_2220.PNG

I LIKE HOW A LOT OF THESE PICS ARE FROM PUBLIC EVENTS AND NOT EVEN PRIVATE

giphy.gif

She even paid some random people as well:

WTF KEVIN AND KATIE

tumblr_mi9zw8CN3N1qlvwnco1_400.gif

Now onto why Tay’s army of skanks wished her a happy birthday now:

After she wished Tay a happy birthday, Gigi announced this:

raw.gif

Taylor’s girlfriend I mean Karlie just had her David Jones autumn/winter campaign come out (no pun intended):

135075fcefa40df84553436ca6e9457c.jpg

Beyoncesipstea.gif

Martha’s Liu Jo SS17 campaign was just released:

unknown_1.01a7d152654.original.jpg

tumblr_nvkg40HQ1Y1tfn6k7o1_500.gif

Tay’s faux token black friend Todrick just made an appearance on Harry:

and after his song was featured in the trailer for the new NBC show Emerald City (remember Universal owns NBC and remember who’s a part of Universal Music Group):

IMG_2221.PNG

giphy.gif

After Ruby wished the bitch a happy birthday, it was announced that she’s in talks to star in Pitch Perfect 3 (the film series is also distributed by Universal Pictures, wonder how she she got the audition):

This is exciting casting news – Ruby Rose is in talks to join Pitch Perfect 3!

No plot details have been released yet and it is not yet known who Ruby will play in the movie, according to Variety.

Pitch Perfect 3 will be directed by Trish Sie, who is taking over for Elizabeth Banks after she dropped out of the director role due to her busy schedule. She will still reprise her role as Gail and produce the film.

Three actresses confirmed to return to the franchise are Anna Kendrick, Rebel Wilson, and Brittany Snow.

Ruby is best known for her work on the third season of Orange Is the New Black and she will soon be seen opposite Vin Diesel in xXx: Return of Xander Cage.

SO NOT SEEING PITCH PERFECT 3 NOW

Friday.gif

Ruby’s Resident Evil: The Final Chapter poster also came out:

Resident Evil : The Final Chapter.

A post shared by Ruby Rose (@rubyrose) on

NOT EVEN PHOTOSHOP CAN MAKE RUBY ROSE LOOK BADASS HOW AWKWARD

0a2c044d22cfdff1c9f40284af62a907.gif

Ruby also has this film coming in January:

XXX_Return_of_Xander_Cage.jpg

tumblr_mxclg2Rttt1qzberoo1_500.gif

Now onto Jaime (these 2 are still faux friends wtf lol), Jaime announced this on her Instagram page:

raw.gif

It was just announced that Blake’s husband Ryan Reynolds has been nominated for a Golden Globe (NBC is also the channel that airs the Golden Globes “sips tea”):

Best Motion Picture, Musical, or Comedy
20th Century Women
Deadpool
La La Land
Florence Foster Jenkins
Sing Street

Best Performance by an Actor in a Motion Picture, Musical, or Comedy
Ryan Gosling, La La Land
Ryan Reynolds, Deadpool
Colin Farrell, The Lobster
Hugh Grant, Florence Foster Jenkins
Jonah Hill, War Dogs

SO YOU KNOW BLAKE IS GONNA TRY TO STEAL THE ATTENTION AWAY FROM HER HUSBAND

qgzOTUM.gif

You all know why that Kennedy Raye girl, Camila Cabello and Todrick Hall wished Tay a happy birthday right?

img_19811.png

img_19821.png

raw.gif

Lily Donaldson just went to the British Fashion Awards:3B127F5B00000578-0-image-m-53_1480965412937.jpg

tumblr_llms9x4lvo1qz9npg.gif

Lily Aldridge just promoted Sakara on her Twitter:

tumblr_n7ytxkuEf11ql5yr7o1_r1_500.gif

For Camila, it was announced that 5th Harmony is releasing a 3rd album:

Fifth Harmony recently rocked the stage at the iHeartRadio Jingle Ball concert (Dec. 9) at Madison Square Garden. During a backstage interview with radio host Elvis Duran, the ladies revealed that they have a third album in the works.

“2017, it’s going to be popping,” promised 5H member Normani Hamilton. “We’re working on Jingle Ball right now, but the third album is definitely going to be so lit,” Dinah Jane Hansen added. “We’re really excited.”

tumblr_nnkvnta6aX1tv4k5po1_500.gif

Onto why Kevin Costner and Katie Couric randomly wished the cunt a happy birthday lol:

Kevin has this movie coming out:

foxmovies-hiddenfigures-header-desktop-front-main-stage.jpg

Yall-Know-What-You-Did-Sip.gif

Katie is currently in the middle of a lawsuit uh oh:

Lawyers for journalist Katie Couric are urging a federal judge to dismiss a $12 million defamation lawsuit filed by Virginia gun rights activists over what they call a misleading documentary edit.

The Virginia Citizens Defense League filed a lawsuit in September over Couric’s documentary “Under the Gun.”

The documentary shows nearly 10 seconds of silence after Couric asks members of the Virginia Citizens Defense League how felons or terrorists could be prevented from purchasing a gun without background checks. Activists can be heard on audio of the exchange responding to Couric’s question almost immediately.

In a motion to dismiss filed this week, Couric’s attorneys say that even if one doesn’t think the edit was appropriate, “it simply does not rise to the level of defamation.”

22128_tv-thats-so-raven-oh-snap.gif

She also just interviewed Edward Snowden:

fc4eceb21daef960f9f9d5e9541b8d8a.jpg

tumblr_n0qv0adgIJ1trzdcyo4_500.gif

Now onto Zayn name-dropping Tay oh great ughhhhh:

Zayn talks about collaborating with the bitch for that terrible 50 Shades Darker song:

“We were kind of in separate places when I mentioned the idea to her. I spoke to her on the phone and she heard the song because (producer) Jack [Antonoff] had played it to her. So she really liked it and she went in the studio the next day,” he said.

Zayn added, “The interesting thing was she’s actually friends with Gi, so she already reached out because Jack had just played her the song anyway, just because we’d done it together and she really liked it…so I asked if she wanted to be on it and she was cool with it.”

WAIT WHAT YOU MENTIONED THE IDEA TO TAY, ZAYN? NICE TRY BITCH LOL AND TAY IS LISTED AS ONE OF THE SONGWRITERS ON THE SONG, DUMBASS LOL:

IMG_2222.PNG

raw.gif

Zayn also teased the music video for the song puke:

“There might be a video coming soon,” Zayn said. “Watch out for that. Yeah, hopefully [Taylor will be in it]. It might be a bit weird if it were someone else.”

hamada+no+one+cares.gif

Now onto John Mayer shading Tay hahahhahahahhaha:

John tweeted this on Tay’s birthday lol:

Cznkdb6XgAETAwx.jpg

WOW, I CAN’T STAND JOHN BUT THIS IS HILARIOUS

Jack_O'Connell.gif

Now onto Reese Witherspoon name-dropping Tay go away bitch ughhhh:

Reese was on Ellen this week and talked about singing Taylor Swift and Katy Perry’s songs for her movie Sing oh dear lol:

“It was much harder. I grew up wanting to be a country music singer so the Walk The Line stuff was more in my heart,” the 40-year-old actress revealed while making an appearance on The Ellen Show, airing today (December 13). “This was really hard and I actually ran into Taylor and Katy while I was doing the movie and was like ‘you guys, this is really hard,’ and they were like ‘yeah, we know.’”

cake.gif

You all know that Sing is a Universal Studios film right?

sing0007.jpg

tumblr_n980pal3Zz1r9c36po1_500.gif

That’s it for the birthday post. I wonder why Tay didn’t have Selena, Lorde, Lena or even Cara wish her a happy birthday. I wonder what happened with those faux friendships. Oh wait. I forgot. These “friendships” are as real as Tay’s implants and ass. My bad lol. But, oh gosh how are people not seeing that these faux friendships are fake like what’s the matter with you? But, Zayn oh gosh either you need more media training or you need to fire your publicist stat. Don’t start pulling a Hailee Steinfeld and confusing people with your lies. People are already confused and fed up by your past behavior in the last year and this year, just don’t. But, wow John Mayer that was hilarious. You get points from me man hahahahahahhahaha. Goodbye now and I’ll be back sooner than later, bitches!

large.gif

Tay’s mess of a Thanksgiving, the bitch is getting her own channel (TF?) and she’s doing a song with Zayn for Fifty Shades Darker (what the actual fuck?)

I have some great news guys! Guess who’s finally back to give you some more scoop about everyone’s favorite white feminist!? If you guessed Nat, you’re correct my friend. So sorry about the long ass break, I’ve been at work and I recently went to Cali to Universal Studios and Disneyland it was so much fun! But, now that I’m officially back, I’m gonna tell some shady stuff about Tay’s Thanksgiving, her getting her own channel on DirectTV (oh dear) and she’s doing a song with Zayn of all people for Fifty Shades Darker (hahahhahahahahha). Let’s get this post break party started:

The-Office.gif

On November 23rd, Tay went to go “support” her faux friend Todrick Hall (who she hasn’t seen since August) at his broadway show Kinky Boots lol:

taylor-swift-todrick-hall-kinky-boots-backstage.jpg

IDK WHAT’S MORE AWKWARD? HOW STAGED THIS ALL LOOKS OR THEIR FAKE “HAPPY” FACIAL EXPRESSIONS OMFG

kim-kardashian-this-is-pathetic-animation.gif

Funny how this hangout happened before this was announced for Todrick:

The Broadway League has announced that Todrick Hall, now starring in Kinky Boots, will serve as a National Ambassador for the 2017 KIDS’ NIGHT ON BROADWAY, taking place in New York City on Tuesday, February 28th, 2017. Tickets to participating shows will go on sale to the public on Tuesday, December 6, 2016 at 10:30am.

giphy.gif

And, you all know why Tay is hanging out with Todrick after not seeing him for 3 1/2 months right?

img_19811.png

img_19821.png

raw.gif

Now onto her messy Thanksgiving dinner lol:

Tay decided to prove that she wasn’t a racist this Thanksgiving by not only inviting her faux friends Martha Hunt and Lily Donaldson, but she also invited Todrick oh dear:

taylor-swift-thanksgiving.jpg

Happy Thanksgiving

A post shared by TODRICK (@todrick) on

💞

A post shared by Lily (@lilydonaldson) on

#mannequinchallenge @todrick @marthahunt @dr.jari @lilydonaldson @austinkingsleyswift @leahmccarthy

A post shared by Taylor Swift (@taylorswift) on

awkward-gif1.gif

Funny, how Lily and Martha hanged out with Tay before this little event:

45b3eb4e8a66b2be23ac78617cde85cc-the-victorias-secret-fashion-show-2016.jpg

Who-Me-Sip.gif

Moreover, it was announced that Tay is getting her very own channel on DirecTV ew:

Taylor Swift is getting her very own television show.

The 26-year-old “Blank Space” singer is teaming up with AT&T and their streaming service, DirecTV Now, according to Billboard.

raw.gif

ALSO, PEOPLE ARE GETTING RID OF CABLE LEFT & RIGHT NOW, TAY HAHAHHAHHAAHA SO GOOD LUCK WITH THIS BUSINESS VENTURE THAT’S NOT GONNA WORK OUT

giphy.gif

And, no one is going to even want to pay for your channel, girl lol. For example:

IMG_2205.PNG

IMG_2206.PNG

SNICKER.gif

Now onto the most hilarious news ever:

Just yesterday, Tay dropped her new single from the upcoming film Fifty Shades Darker featuring no one other than Zayn hahhahahahahhaha:

#fiftyshadesdarker #idontwannaliveforever

A post shared by Taylor Swift (@taylorswift) on

Z | T | 50 @zayn @fiftyshadesmovie #fiftyshadesdarker @itunes #idontwannaliveforever

A post shared by Taylor Swift (@taylorswift) on

4MQ18_s-200x150.gif

Also, this happened yesterday hahahhahahhaah:

tumblr_ohwjalZCom1vjezx7o1_1280.jpg

tumblr_ohwjalZCom1vjezx7o4_1280.jpg

tumblr_ohwjalZCom1vjezx7o3_1280.jpg

tumblr_ohwjalZCom1vjezx7o5_1280.jpg

tumblr_ohwjalZCom1vjezx7o2_1280.jpg

giphy.gif

And, guess who Tay and Zayn paid to promote the song? You guessed it!

raw.gif

Funny how this happened after Gigi won Model of the Year (how much did she pay for that award geez lol):

PANews BT_P-01d9a46c-71ed-40a2-891d-3fab6c945df5_I1.jpg

giphy.gif

and after Gigi and Lena spoke at a woman’s empowerment panel for Reebok what the actual fuck:

tumblr_inline_n0ejh9iDOl1qbygev.gif

Lorde was also paid to promote the song saying this oh gosh:IMG_2207.PNG

And, you all know Lorde has been working on new music right?

Lorde has been hanging in New York City and it looks like she’s putting the finishing touches on her album!

e6df24ab94fb8a282eea97f4d5986890.gif

Also, never forget that Zayn and Tay are both RCA artists:

zayn-malik-twitter-460x389.jpg

img_1970.png

img_1971.png

raw.gif

Now onto horrible actor Ryan Reynolds name-dropping Tay wtf:

Ryan decided to talk about why he was making that uncomfortable face in that 4th of July pic for some odd reason lol:

When asked by Entertainment Weekly if he was actually upset in the photo, Ryan replied, “No, that’s a problem I’ve had all my life. If I’m not aware a photo is being taken, my natural resting face is one of a man dying.”

“I had no idea somebody was taking a photo,” he added. “Therefore I was resting comfortably in my persona of a man whose soul is visibly exiting this earth.”

giphy.gif

Funny, how this happened before Ryan was honored at a GQ event for being man of the year wtf lol:

3A5E428500000578-3935364-image-a-34_1479149587414.jpg

coffee.gif

That is all for this posts. Oh gosh, I fucking predicted this I knew this was why she became faux friends with Dakota Johnson hahhahahahhaha. I should win an award or something like that man. I’m more psychic than Raven Baxter lol. But, oh gosh if she really thinks this song is going to get nominated for an Oscar just like what happened with The Weeknd than she’s more delusional than I thought lol. Also, I thought she was a so called “feminist”? Why is she doing a song for a movie about abuse? Oh wait. I forgot. She’s a white feminist and we all know they only care about issues when there’s something in store for them lol. But, oh Zayn I have no words for you anymore. You’re just a pathetic famewhore asshole now. And, can you guys just imagine them singing this live onstage. Oh gosh, I’m gonna laugh if they can actually be on the same stage together at the same time, because there would be so much ego on that stage lol. Moving on now, who the hell is even gonna watch that channel of hers? She’s probably gonna have her playing with her cats and doing boring shit like baking cupcakes hahhahahahahhaha. That’s it for this post and I will be back soon to celebrate the bitch’s 27th birthday (even though it seems like she’s turning 13). Goodbye now!

photofunky.gif

I report the rest of November 2016!

Good morning my amazing and beautiful readers. I’m finally back with more news about everyone’s favorite drama queen Taylor Alison Swift. Today in her dramatic fairytale adventures of doom, I’m gonna talk about why she and her ex-beards Calvin Harris and Tom Hiddleston are on good terms (wtf), her reportedly shading Katy Perry at the Met Ball (petty bitch), Eddie Redmayne denying that they ever dated (lol), The AMAs exposing Tay and Drake’s publicity stunt (omg) and how she made Gigi and Selena’s AMAS news about herself. (Never change Tay) Let me serve that one right up for you:

tenor.gif

On November 14th, it was announced that Tay was on “good terms” with ex-beards, Calvin Harris and Tom Hiddleston hahhahahahahhahaa:

A new report claims that the 26-year-old singer has already written songs about the 35-year-old actor, as well as her other ex-boyfriend Calvin Harris.

But, they reportedly aren’t mean-spirited breakup tracks.

“[Taylor] has spoken to Adam on text,” a source told E! News, adding that it’s less about “getting back together” and “more of a friendly check-in.”

The source also said, “She also is on good terms with Tom at this point.”

giphy.gif

Also, it’s funny how it was announced that she was on good terms with both guys, because this was just announced about Cal:

Omnia Las Vegas NYE

A post shared by Calvin Harris (@calvinharris) on

and this trailer was just released for Tom:

tumblr_nye7bwqCLz1u5351mo1_500.gif

Moving on, according to annoying Bravo famewhore Andy Cohen, Tay reportedly shaded Katy Perry ughhhhhh:

“Why I felt I needed to get involved I will never know (maybe I was auditioning for her squad?) but I innocently said exactly the wrong thing to her, which was, ‘Your friend Katy is sitting in the corner and there’s plenty of room around her,’” he wrote.

Taylor then reportedly responded, “Katy who?”

“I said, ‘Perry,’ at which point she clearly let me know that she’s the exact opposite of her friend,” Andy went on.

He added that Taylor asked him not to repeat the exchange on his show. However, “She didn’t threaten me about putting it in my book,” he explained. “So here we are.”

WOW, IF THIS IS ALL TRUE (WHICH I WOULDN’T BE SURPRISED ABOUT, BECAUSE BAD BLOOD HELLO), THEN TAY,

tumblr_mlj6alkMZj1rkoa6bo1_500.gif

Moreover, Oscar winner Eddie Redmayne was just on Andy’s talk show Watch What Happens Live and was asked about those pesky dating rumors involving him and Taylor omg check it out:

WOW SO HE BASICALLY CONFIRMED SHE AUDITIONED FOR LES MIS AND LOST THE ROLE TO SAMANTHA BARKS I CAN’T LOL GO EDDIE

77157-However-There-Was-A-Problem-In-Our-Household...and-It-Stank..gif

Now onto the AMAS stuff oh dear:

To make Gigi’s hosting gig about herself, I mean to wish her faux friend good luck on her hosting gig, Tay decided to put this on Instagram:

This BABE is about to host AMAs with the amazing Jay Pharoah. Watch!! @gigihadid @jaypharoah

A post shared by Taylor Swift (@taylorswift) on

OH GOSH IDK WHAT’S MORE AWKARD: THIS PIC CONTAINING GIGI’S FAKE SMILE OR THE FACT THAT SHE’S TAKING ATTENTION AWAY FROM HER FAUX FRIEND

giphy.gif

BTW, how ironic that Tay did this for Gigi before this gig:

“Kendall Jenner, Gigi Hadid and Karlie Kloss (!) Return to Victoria’s Secret Runway; Irina Shayk Makes Her VS Debut”

raw.gif

During the AMAS, the producers decided to show this awkward ass commercial:

and then they decided to show this other awkward ass commercial:

AMAS, WERE YOU GUYS TRYING TO TELL US SOMETHING LAST NIGHT?

smug-spongebob.gif

Anyway, Tay being her bitchy self decided to ofc make Selena’s win all about her wow:

BTW THAT CHEERING IS COMING FROM THE SAME BITCH WHO DIDN’T SUPPORT HER FAUX FRIEND WHEN SHE WAS IN REHAB

giphy.gif

That’s it for this post. Oh gosh, the AMAS were just terrible last night to Gigi’s terrible hosting gig to Selena’s discount Mother Theresa speech like wtf was that shit last night. And, don’t even get me started on how Selena beat both ADELE & RIHANNA like can you say rigged? Anyway, oh gosh I’m not excited for the Victoria’s Secret Fashion Show that’s coming up, because not only will there be basic nepotism models walking the runway, Taylor might make an unwelcome cameo at the event. But, I might laugh if she does like she doesn’t like any of her faux friends having attention doesn’t she? She loves to have the spotlight all to herself and no one else lol. Bitch needs help. Goodbye everyone and I hope you all have a great Thanksgiving!

farewell-gif.gif

The real reason Tay wished Lorde a happy birthday and the bitch gets mocked on Family Guy

Good evening my beautiful readers. Nat is back with more news about everyone’s favorite stupid ho Taylor Alison Swift. Today in her dramatic fairytale adventures, I’m gonna talk about why she really wished faux friend Lorde a happy birthday (besides the fact that their record labels on both under the Universal Music Group umbrella). Also, Family Guy shaded the cunt as well lol. Let me tell you all about it:

tumblr_nc8gpr05Hk1qkomroo1_500.gif

Just last night, Tay “helped” celebrate her faux friend Lorde’s birthday with her faux friends Aziz Ansari (wtf), her faux DUFF Lena Dunham (who she hasn’t seen since like forever lol), her girlfriend Karlie Kloss and Mae Whitman (the hell?):

 

💕💕💕

A post shared by Taylor Swift (@taylorswift) on

a tough as guts balloon veteran

A post shared by Lorde (@lordemusic) on

made my wishes ✨

A post shared by Lorde (@lordemusic) on

When you both wear cat shirts 🐾@azizansari

A post shared by Taylor Swift (@taylorswift) on

SOME OF THESE PICS LOOK SO AWKWARD AND STAGED AS HELL OMFG

NCXson1.gif

Now let me tell you why this all happened:

Lorde released a letter on her Facebook page not only about turning 20, but she also teased new music:

A NOTE FROM THE DESK OF A NEWBORN ADULT
Tomorrow I turn 20, and it’s all I’ve been able to think about for days. I walk around the city, up by the park and by the health food store and down into the subway, this new age hanging in front of my eyes like two of those Mylar balloons that never come down. Can people see it, I wonder, that I’m about to cross over? On the subway I stare at boys I want to kiss and girls I want to hug. Do you see me?
I’m eating raspberries sitting up in bed, thinking about watching The Crown, and I probably should have written something nicer ages ago but my head is so full of lyrics and drums these days that this is all I can manage. But it feels very important I write to you, for some reason.
I was 16 when most of us met. Can you believe it? I laugh thinking about that me now – that glossy idiot god, princess of her childhood streets, handmade and ugly and sure of herself.
All my life I’ve been obsessed with adolescence, drunk on it. Even when I was little, I knew that teenagers sparkled. I knew they knew something children didn’t know, and adults ended up forgetting.
Since 13 I’ve spent my life building this giant teenage museum, mausoleum maybe, dutifully wolfishly writing every moment down, and repeating it all back like folklore. And now there isn’t any more of it.
(!!!!!!!!!!!!!!)
(*insert that emoji that looks like it’s eating its own face with worry, and also the one with sunglasses, and maybe also the poo*)
And I know, I know! There’s different stuff. Stuff that’s just as good, maybe better, just in a different way. If I’m being real with myself, in some ways I stopped feeling like a teenager a while ago.
Sometime in the last year or so, part of me crossed over. For one thing, I made a very deliberate choice to withdraw for a little while from a public life. I haven’t had my hair or makeup done in a year, the free handbags dried up LONG ago, and the paparazzi at the airport are almost always for someone else. And let me tell you, as much as I love being full noise album cycle girl, it’s been a motherfucking joy. (every once in a while I am recognised on the street – one of you breathlessly clutches my hand, shaking and speaking quickly, and I feel this SHOCK of love.)
I turned inwards to my friends, my family, towards this moment, so I could learn more about who I was, and so I could let this new project show itself to me.
And oh my god, it was a colossal year! One for the ages. I maxed out every single emotion I have in the best possible way, the colours still aching behind my eyes like this weird blissful hangover.
My heart broke. I moved out of home and into the city and I made new friends and started to realize that no-one is just good or bad, that everyone is both. I started to discover in a profound, scary, blood-aching way who I was when I was alone, what I did when I did things only for myself. I was reckless and graceless and terrifying and tender. I threw sprawling parties and sat in restaurants until the early hours, learning what it’s like to be an adult, even talking like one sometimes, until I caught myself. All I wanted to do was dance. I whispered into ears and let my eyes blaze on high and for the first time I felt this intimate, empire-sized inner power.
And then I wrote a record about it, all of it, so much more than what I’ve written down here, and I’m in new york getting it done. And tomorrow, I’m not a kid any more, and more and more I’m realizing that the weirdness of those Mylar balloons is going to be okay.
Writing Pure Heroine was my way of enshrining our teenage glory, putting it up in lights forever so that part of me never dies, and this record – well, this one is about what comes next.
I want nothing more than to spill my guts RIGHT NOW about the whole thing – I want you to see the album cover, pore over the lyrics (the best I’ve written in my life), touch the merch, experience the live show. I can hardly stop myself from typing out the name. I just need to keep working a while longer to make it as good as it can be. You’ll have to hold on. The big day is not tomorrow, or even next month realistically, but soon. I know you understand.
Oh my god it’s midnight now!!! I’m 20 fuck!!!!! And my perfect little brother Angelo is 15!! Happy birthday, kid. Sorry your sister is so weird and emotional in public all the time.
What i’m trying to say is: this is a special birthday. The party is about to start. I am about to show you the new world.
I love you forever.
L

giphy.gif

Karlie has the Victoria’s Secret fashion show coming up (wanna bet that Tay is gonna make this entire event about herself?):

The 2016 Victoria’s Secret Fashion Show is promising to be bigger than ever. Not only is it in a new location—Paris, of all places—but Kendall Jenner, Karlie Kloss, Irina Shayk, Gigi and Bella Hadid will take to the catwalk in their finest lingerie.

2DvoY.gif

This was just announced about Aziz:

Momofuku’s app, Ando, already has a celebrity chef. Now it has celebrity investors.

Aziz Ansari and Jimmy Fallon are two of the angel investors behind Momofuku restaurateur David Chang’s investment round for the tech project.

Ando is a delivery-only service available in select New York neighborhoods. The food is made in an undisclosed location, and the recipes are designed specifically for delivery. New York customers within the Midtown East delivery zone can order cheesesteak, fried chicken and other lunch or dinner options through the mobile app or online.

The company this week raised $7 million in a Series A round led by Forerunner. This round is the first time Chang has taken on any significant venture financing for any of his restaurants.

and this as well:

The Smithsonian has announced this year’s winners of their American Ingenuity Awards for innovation in art, science, and culture, AP reports. They include comedian Aziz Ansari, as well as David Lynch for his work bringing transcendental meditation techniques to inner-city schools. Rock band and novelty-video-institution OK Go are also being recognized for this year’s “Upside Down & Inside Out” video, which was shot in zero gravity. Other winners include LeeAnne Walters, a mother who helped spread awareness of the water crisis in Flint, and Jeff Bezos, founder of Amazon.com. The ceremony takes place on December 8.

Beyoncesipstea.gif

Lena just released a terrible rap video supporting Hillary Clinton (make this fat bitch stop):

ada9f6d800cd0dafe2e574c3b906b558.gif

Also, Mae’s film Operator just came out on DVD & Video On Demand today:

MV5BMzkzMTg4ODA5OF5BMl5BanBnXkFtZTgwMzIwNzEzMDI@._V1_UY1200_CR99,0,630,1200_AL_.jpg

9M6mD.gif

And, you all know why Taylor is hanging out with Aziz, Lena and Mae right?

img_1981.png

img_1982.png

47089-Theres-no-cure-for-being-a-cun-ZmXR.gif

Now onto Family Guy making fun of the stupid bitch:

On Sunday, Family Guy decided to poke fun at Tay lol:

GO SETH OMFG

tumblr_n7ruwrJnWA1smcbm7o1_500.gif

That’s the end of this post, folks. Oh gosh, I love how it was supposed to be Lorde’s birthday, but people are acting like it’s Taylor’s birthday like wtf. If I were Lorde, I would’ve been so fucking pissed. But, I’d like to applaud Seth MacFarlene for shading the cunt. That was the probably the most hilarious Family Guy episode I’ve seen in a long time. So, thank you lol. But, do you guys think Tay is gonna try to sue Seth for telling the truth about her? I sure hope not. If she does, she’s an even more crazier bitch than I thought lol.  That’s all for now. I’ll be back though with more about the spoiled brat soon folks. Bye!

tumblr_m9akbdFEI51rt3fn2.gif

Tay and Drake rumors, Taylor makes Ryan Reynolds’ birthday about her and her immature Halloween bash

Hello, my amazing readers! I’m back with more news about everyone’s favorite drama queen Taylor Alison Swift. Today in her dramatic adventures, I’m gonna discuss those pesky Drake rumors (what the actual fuck), her making her faux friend Ryan Reynolds’ birthday about her ofc (so pathetic) and her stupid Halloween bash (why does she always throw these immature parties? I wonder what her 30th birthday is gonna look like in 2019 omg). Let’s celebrate the beginning of November and let me get started on that post for ya:

tumblr_mzfi63t6mH1qi33lwo2_500.gif

On October 28th, it was announced that Tay had met Drake’s mom (what is up with her meeting her beard’s moms after 5 days of dating wtf):

The 26-year-old singer attended the rapper’s 30th birthday party this past weekend and she was introduced to his mom Sandi Graham at the event. She was joined at the party by a bunch of her gal pals.

Sources close to the stars confirmed to Gossip Cop that the two entertainers are “just friends” and any speculation otherwise is not true.

raw.gif

As you all know, Taylor and Drake’s record labels are both under the Universal Music Group umbrella:

img_197011.png

img_19781.png

img_19791.png

img_1984.png

img_19801.png

Well, guess what else I found out!? Drake also has a partnership with Apple Music! Take a look:

The hip-hop artist’s latest music available through Apple is a big hit.

It turns out that Drake’s relationship with Apple is going quite well.

The hip-hop musician sold 632,000 copies of his new album, Views, during its first 24 hours of availability in Apple’s iTunes store, The Wall Street Journal reported. Over the first five days on sale, Drake sold more than 1 million albums through iTunes while Apple Music users streamed the album more than 250 million times, according to the article.

Drake has been one of the more prominent musicians to endorse Apple Music over the years. Last year, he served as an onstage spokesman at Apple’s AAPL -1.81% Worldwide Developers Conference when the company unveiled Apple Music. Since then, he has aired radio shows on Apple Music’s Beats 1 radio station and let Apple use his tracks in several Apple Music ads.

The Apple Music promotion is part of a broader deal Drake is said to have signed with Apple last year for $19 million. The deal included him promoting Apple Music and apparently some exclusivity that includes his work with Beats 1 and his decision to initially offer online album sales and streaming of Views only through Apple.

And, you all probably know by now who else has a partnership with Apple Music right? Oh, you don’t? Well, take a look at this:

“Different year, different partner.” That is an accurate description of the industry maneuvering behind Apple Music’s new relationship with Taylor Swift and the pair’s just-announced exclusive on a 1989 tour documentary.

Those looking for greater meaning in the Swift/Apple partnership can look at it as a changing of the guard; many of the most popular artists have shunned streaming services over the years. Occasionally a band like Metallica or Led Zeppelin would bring their catalogs exclusively to Spotify to great fanfare. And occasionally an artist successful enough to rile their distributors, from Thom Yorke to Adele, would keep their music off streaming services for one reason or another. Now Swift, an outspoken critic of Spotify who has routinely kept her newest music off streaming services, is going with Apple Music to release new content.

raw.gif

Moving on now to Taylor Swift’s birthday party I mean Ryan Reynolds’ birthday party:

Ryan Reynolds was celebrating his 40th birthday party with his famewhore wife Blake Lively and he posted this pic on Instagram:

Taylor being the famewhore she is decided to drop this comment:

“Thanks guys, Now I’m drowning in tears of joy,” Taylor commented on the pic.

ZWg87_f-maxage-0.gif

Also, I love how didn’t even respond to her unnecessary comment and I love how Blake didn’t even say anything either. Goes to show such “great” friends they all truly are huh?

post-59355-Simpsons-Fox-Censor-haha-ha-no-SoJW.gif

Now onto some great news, Katy Perry filmed herself dancing to the song Famous (you know the song where Kanye disses the bitch) at one of his concerts lol:

GO KATY PERRY!

5989eaaaf1b0e1f4f3da81c91ac99fc1ef23f8b9_hq.gif

Now onto the Halloween Bash oh gosh lol:

On October 31st, Tay was spotted celebrating Halloween with her faux friends Martha Hunt, Gigi Hadid, Camila Cabello (who she hasn’t even seen since April OMFG), Lily Donaldson, Emmie Gundler and Kennedy Raye:

taylor-swift-hosts-halloween-party-with-her-squad.jpg

taylor-swift-hosts-halloween-party-with-her-squad-02.jpg

OH GOSH WTF IS HAPPENING IN THESE PICS AND WHY ARE THE DRESSED SO YOUNGER THAN THEY LOOK OMFG

85a6c1c1691c8c08510dcecad89ff2f7.gif

Taylor even commented this on her Instagram about her costume oh dear lol:

“Thanks @vancityreynolds for this costume, you’re the BEST deadpool inside contact ever!”

and Blake realizing she needed to make this about herself also, commented this on the pic:

“#HusbandUpgrade,”

confused.gif

Funny, how this happened after the trailer for Ryan’s new movie Life (co-starring Jake Gyllenhaal aka Tay’s ex beard) dropped:

and after it was announced that Blake’s terrible movie All I see is you found a distributing film studio:

Open Road Films has acquired all U.S. rights to the drama thriller “All I See Is You,” directed by Marc Forster and starring Blake Lively and Jason Clarke. They will release the film nationwide August 4, 2017. It world-premiered at this year’s Toronto International Film Festival.

OH GOSH THAT FILM IS OPENING THE SAME DAY AS ALIEN: COVENANT THAT’S SO NOT GOING TO FLOP

giphy.gif

Gigi also had this to say about the bash:

“It was really cool, we were all working so my friend had a little, like, girls’ night at her house. We had chips and guacamole and pizza,” she explained.

Gigi later added, “I had a really, really intense costume planned and then I said, maybe I’ll save it. So then I found a cub scout shirt in Japan at a vintage store, and I made a costume out of it.”

DID SHE REALLY SAY THAT WE WERE ALL WORKING OMFG

9832_81be.gif

Now let me tell you why the rest of these bitches all needed publicity shall we:

Martha, Gigi & Lily all have the Victoria’s Secret Fashion Show coming up:

img_1972.png

img_1973.png

Lily Donaldson has been in the Victoria’s Secret Fashion Show since 2010 and the 29-year-old British model will be back in 2016.

The Hadids are going to Paris! Not only will Gigi Hadid walk the Victoria’s Secret Fashion Show runway for the second year in a row, but her sister, Bella Hadid, will join her.

tumblr_nvkg40HQ1Y1tfn6k7o1_500.gif

Camila the cunt just released a new song:

Bad_things_cover_art.jpg

and you all know why Tay is hanging out with Camila and that Kennedy Raye chick right:

img_1981.png

img_1982.png

giphy.gif

and don’t forget that Taylor and 5th Harmony are both under the Sony umbrella:

img_10201.png

img_1021.png

img_1180.png

img_1181.png

e6df24ab94fb8a282eea97f4d5986890.gif

That’s it for this ridiculous post bitches. Oh gosh, Taylor is getting more ridiculous and immature by the minutes. Like, are you even sure you’re 26 Tay? Because, you’re acting like a 12 year old girl stuck in a grown ass woman’s body. Like, seriously you’re the same age as Ashley Benson and Elizabeth Olsen and they act 10x mature than you, bitch. Are you scared by the time you reach 30 that your stupid fans won’t buy your immature and terrible music anymore and you think a mid life crisis is gonna get you through life? It didn’t work for Johnny Depp, it’s not going to work for you, cunt. But, oh gosh does this mean she’s gonna go to the Victoria’s Secret show and take away the attention from her faux friends? I wouldn’t be surprised if she did that shit, I mean she did it to Gigi back in September so she wouldn’t have any remorse doing it again. Bye bye everyone and I can’t wait until December, because I’m gonna cook up a great birthday post about the stupid bitch. Bye everyone!
tumblr_lt77wxGe4W1qdlkgg.gif

 

 

My review of what’s happened so far in October 2016!!!!

Good morning my amazing readers! Nat is back with more news about everyone’s favorite closeted lesbian Taylor Alison Swift! Today, I’m gonna review the rest of what happened in October and I’m gonna talk about a lot of the shady shit that happened to the stupid bitch in this month. Let me get started on that post for you:

princess-and-the-frog-tiana-waitress-Favim.com-2794925.gif

On October 10th, the paps followed Tay’s faux friend Cara Delevingne after she called them:

tumblr_oeurf8yLhM1ttas6ao1_400.jpg

tumblr_oeurf8yLhM1ttas6ao2_400.jpg

AWWW IS SOMEONE UPSET BECAUSE HER FILM CAREER ISN’T GOING THE WAY IT’S SUPPOSED TO?

tumblr_ljp0ljKYlr1qdf8w1o1_500.gif

The next night, Cara was spotted Tay along with new basic faux friends Dakota Johnson & Suki Waterhouse:

tumblr_oey5bafbRA1vxgtrjo3_400.jpg

tumblr_oey5bafbRA1vxgtrjo1_400.jpg

tumblr_oey5bafbRA1vxgtrjo2_400.jpg

3957705E00000578-3835559-image-m-61_1476328525022.jpg

ALL OF HER FAUX FRIEND OUTINGS ARE GETTING SO BASIC AND AWKWARD BY THE MINUTE

shaking_head_breaking_bad.gif

On October 12th, Tay attended a “secret” Kings of Leon show with a lot of her faux friends:

3957B5A100000578-3835559-image-m-38_1476327404325.jpg

3957C84F00000578-3835559-Hell_bent_for_leather_Suki_Waterhouse_had_ventured_out_in_advent-m-84_1476330460258.jpg

3958817200000578-3835559-image-a-7_1476344568307.jpg

3958606900000578-3835559-image-m-6_1476344558665.jpg

3957B74500000578-3835559-image-m-46_1476327675708.jpg

395882A900000578-3835559-image-a-24_1476345180163.jpg

3957B59900000578-3835559-image-m-56_1476327945270.jpg

3958820E00000578-3835559-image-a-26_1476345195011.jpg

395883AE00000578-3835559-On_the_Hunt_Model_Martha_was_no_doubt_looking_forward_to_catchin-a-25_1476345194936.jpg

3958613D00000578-3835559-image-a-9_1476344822205.jpg

395E22EE00000578-3837451-image-m-5_1476410379753.jpg

taylor-swift-squad-king-of-leon-show-02.jpg

OH GOSH IDK WHAT’S MORE AWKWARD: HOW FAKE THIS ALL LOOKS OR HOW UNHAPPY THEY ALL SEEM

tumblr_mj7nowlyXE1rb2799o5_250.gif

Now let me tell you why Tay went to the Kings of Leon concert and why Lily and Martha hungout with her:

giphy.gif

I bet y’all are wondering, why the hell was Taylor Swift at a Kings of Leon concert? That doesn’t seem like her type of music. Well, her and the band are both a part of RCA! Take a look!

IMG_1969.PNG

IMG_1970.PNG

IMG_1971.PNG

2b67077730fded8c3f18cbe7637d817e0990d177.gif

Also, their new single Around the World just dropped:

kings-of-leon-drop-around-the-world-stream-lyrics-download.jpg

Moreover, the music video had also just dropped and look who the special guest is in the video:

mama-dee-sips-tea.gif

They also released their new single Reverend came out:

kings-of-leon-reverend-stream-lyrics-download.jpg

and their new album WALLS came out on October 14th (the day after the concert):

Kings-of-Leon-Walls-2016-2480x2480.jpg

raw.gif

And, guess what!? Their new album went straight to #1!!!!!

A congrats is in order for Kings of Leon!

The guys – Caleb, Nathan, Jared, and Matthew Followill – just scored their first-ever No. 1 album on the Billboard 200 chart with their seventh studio album, Walls.

It sold 77,000 equivalent album units, with 68,000 of those in traditional album sales.

In case you don’t know, the Billboard 200 chart ranks the most popular albums of the week based on multi-metric consumption, including traditional album sales, track equivalent albums (TEA), and streaming equivalent albums (SEA).

Walls was released on October 14 via RCA Records.

GEEZ I WONDER HOW IT WENT STRAIGHT TO #1?

HUgn5FB.gif

Now onto why Lily hungout with Tay lol:

Lily decided to do what she does best and name drop Taylor at the God’s Love We Deliver 2016 Golden Heart Awards oh dear lol:

“We are a really nice group of women who support each other and really, genuinely have each others’ back and it’s awesome,” Aldridge tells us. “That’s something to be about.”

THEN, WHERE THE HELL WERE SOME OF YOU WHEN TAY WAS BEING ATTACKED BY KIMYE WHY DIDN’T SOME OF Y’ALL DEFEND HER THEN? ALSO, DON’T TALK ABOUT HOW YOU GUYS “SUPPORT” EACH OTHER AND WHATNOT WHEN THIS EXISTS:

badblood.jpg

B63fBex_zpsb8d07922.gif

Also, this was just announced about Lily and Martha:

IMG_1972.PNG

IMG_1973.PNG

giphy.gif

And, as to why Lorde was hanging out with Tay:

IMG_1974.PNG

IMG_1975.PNG

IMG_1976.PNG

tumblr_mzpxa7nSm11ql5yr7o1_500.gif

Also, don’t forget that Lorde is a Republic Records artist and you all know what that means:

IMG_1969.PNG

IMG_1970.PNG

IMG_1978.PNG

IMG_1979.PNG

IMG_1980.PNG

IMG_1977.PNG

raw.gif

Now onto some Kanye news:

Apparently, some stupid swifties attacked Kanye, because some new lyrics leaked from Kanye’s song about Taylor oh gosh lol:

It’s the song that kicked off a year of drama between Kanye West, Kim Kardashian West and Taylor Swift, and now the original version of “Famous” has hit the Internet.

On Thursday, an earlier recording of West’s song surfaced online, and the controversial lyrics involving the “Shake It Off” singer and his ex Amber Rose contrast from what the rapper changed them to in the final version of the track.

“I feel like Taylor Swift still owe me sex / I made that bitch famous,” West is heard rapping on the demo. He then repeats part of the verse but subs in Rose’s name. “I feel like Amber Rose still owe me sex / Why? I made that bitch famous / Not really, but somewhat famous,” he raps.

YOU KNOW SWIFTIES, MAYBE HE DECIDED TO USE THE OTHER LYRICS BECAUSE THEY PROBABLY SOUNDED BETTER AND SO HE DECIDED TO USE THOSE INSTEAD OF THIS ONE SO SWIFTIES

tumblr_inline_o5stsvAW4D1qi9fgw_500.gif

Anyway, moving on now. On October 13th, Tay was spotted going to a Eliot Summer concert with faux friends Suki Waterhouse, Cara Delevigne, Dakota Johnson, girlfriend I mean special friend Karlie Kloss and new faux friends Serena Williams and Zoe Kravitz (what the actual fuck?)

395EF76600000578-3837505-Later_on_the_star_joined_her_BFF_Karlie_Kloss_at_the_Carolina_Fe-m-186_1476426671922.jpg

395DF66F00000578-3837505-image-a-98_1476412309640.jpg

395DF52F00000578-3837505-image-m-97_1476412301729.jpg

395E777800000578-3837505-image-a-117_1476419212785.jpg

395DF52B00000578-3837505-image-a-93_1476412193509.jpg

395DF36E00000578-0-image-a-92_1476410726562.jpg

395DF53700000578-3837505-Black_jean_brigade_Model_Cara_Delevingne_followed_suit_in_some_t-m-100_1476412451101.jpg

WHY THE HELL DO THEY ALL LOOK SO UNHAPPY TOGETHER? LIKE CHEER UP BITCHES! YOU’RE ALL SUPPOSED TO BE “BEST FRIENDS” SO CHEER THE FUCK UP!

YVr4urH.gif

Now, let me tell you all the real reason why this outing happened:

tumblr_mezpkfrybM1rxr02u.gif

This was just announced about Suki:

In a city as sunny and carefree as Los Angeles, the British have to stick together, and that’s exactly how Suki Waterhouse and Poppy Jamie became friends. Now, they’re taking their relationship to the next level by launching a business: Called Pop& Suki, it’s a line of jewelry and handbags inspired by their friendship. The bag offerings include a camera bag and shopper tote in cotton candy, noir and cognac colorways, and can be made personal with monograms, straps and leather attachments. Jewelry is equally customizable; a paperclip-style chain can be worn as a necklace, bracelet, anklet or body chain, with a choice of charms of crystal add-ons.

tumblr_nip7laqudv1r8jjn6o1_250.gif

As to why Cara has been hanging out with Tay:

Her upcoming flop Valerian had just released a poster:

Coming soon… @valerianmovie @lucbesson @badgalriri

A post shared by Cara Delevingne (@caradelevingne) on

Her Rimmel London ad had just come out:

WAIT CARA, I THOUGHT YOU WERE RETIRING FROM MODELING SO THAT YOU COULD BECOME A FULL TIME ACTRESS? OH WAIT, I FORGOT YOUR ACTING CAREER IS JUST AS BAD AS YOUR COKE ADDICTION

tumblr_m81qb7SOd51qmuesuo1_500.gif

Also, Cara is getting her own documentary wtf:

Model, actress, Instagram star, and famous maker of funny faces Cara Delevingne can now add another notch to her growing CV: documentary subject. The forthcoming film, The Cara Project, found a distributor, as it was reported yesterday, and promises a window into both her career trajectory from model to actress and a behind-the-scenes glimpse at her vibrant, outsize personality.

OMFG I WOULD TOTALLY WANT TO WATCH A DOCUMENTARY ABOUT CARA DELEVINGNE

tumblr_mlsnilvkcW1rkod5mo1_500.gif

As to why and how Dakota has been hanging out with her new “bestie” Tay:

This was just announced about her franchise 50 Shades of Grey:

Grab the nearest brown paper bag. This news might induce hyper ventilating.

With the release of Fifty Shades Darker now looming closer than ever, fans of the hot and heavy book-to-cinema franchise are eager to know every detail surrounding the sequel to Fifty Shades of Grey. While early September brought the tantalizing first look at the drama starring Dakota Johnson and Jamie Dornan, soon audiences will have the opportunity to get up close and personal with their most intimate moments.

Director James Foley revealed Friday virtual reality technology is being utilized to bring Fifty Shades Darker to life, Deadline reports.

“Yeah, there’s marketing materials for behind-the scenes [of Fifty Shades Darker], where after we finished shooting for the day, the actors would stay over and VR people would re-create a facsimile of the scene,” Foley told audience members during a VR event on the Paramount Pictures lot.

Further specifics of the project were not disclosed, but we can only imagine the hype to get a taste of Anastasia Steele and Christian Grey’s romance will only increase tenfold once it’s released.

WHO THE HELL WOULD WANT TO SEE THAT SHIT OMFG

42179_megan-fox-gross-disgusted-eww.gif

Also, the Fifty Shades Darker Instagram has been releasing sneak peeks of the movie:

"I want to give you the world, Anastasia." #FiftyShadesDarker

A post shared by Fifty Shades Darker (@fiftyshadesmovie) on

🔥🔥🔥🔥 #FiftyShadesDarker

A post shared by Fifty Shades Darker (@fiftyshadesmovie) on

Shhh. Don’t miss @ericjohnson as Jack Hyde in #FiftyShadesDarker.

A post shared by Fifty Shades Darker (@fiftyshadesmovie) on

#KimBasinger stars as Elena in #FiftyShadesDarker.

A post shared by Fifty Shades Darker (@fiftyshadesmovie) on

#Regram from @erikaljames: #FBF #FSoG between takes. The bar room scene. #DakotaJohnson #JamieDornan

A post shared by Fifty Shades Darker (@fiftyshadesmovie) on

OH GOSH THIS MOVIE LOOKS TERRIBLE AND I PRAY THAT IT FLOPS

758c2595d1025d1f98a272464ccd5ad4.gif

Oh and there’s more as to why Tay has decided to include Dakota in her faux friend squad:

As you all Tay’s record label Big Machine Records is distributed by Universal Music Group:

img_19701.png

img_1978.png

img_1979.png

Well, look what I found out about 50 Shades of Grey:

IMG_1985.PNG

IMG_1986.PNG

bXMJq.gif

Also, this was announced about Karlie:

Karlie Kloss’ talents know no bounds.

Amongst her numerous catwalk appearances and scoring the most coveted fashion campaigns, she still manages to find time to teach girls how to code, host her own YouTube channel ‘Klossy’ and attend classes at NYU.

Showing no signs of slowing down any time soon the 24-year-old entrepreneur is now moving into television. And no, it’s not presenting America’s Next Top Model.

Instead, Karlie will be starring in a new science programme landing on Netflix next Spring: Bill Nye Saves the World. Coolest science teacher, ever? Er, yes. She will also be joined by fellow correspondents Joanna Hausmann, Nazeem Hussain, Emily Calandrelli and Derek Muller – discussing the impact science has had on everything from religion, culture to politics.

Bill’s fashionable sidekick will be offering her own ‘nerdy’ insights, teasing fans on social media about her new role.

‘We’ll be talking about every nerdy thing you can think of – so be sure to tune in,’ the model announced on Instagram.

WHAT THE ACTUAL THE FUCK IS THIS SHIT

tumblr_n09pci638Z1t0lwzlo1_500.gif

And this too:

tumblr_of2ejjGfJ11vbb5afo1_1280.jpg

tumblr_o1icbkf2Hr1qjl5rvo1_250.gif

Now onto why Serena and Zoe hungout with the cunt:

According to Blind Gossip, Taylor is trying to do damage control by “befriending” people of color omg:

IMG_1981.PNG

IMG_1982.PNG

you-racist-bitch.gif

Also, Serena’s Fader cover came out:

serena-williams-the-fader-1.jpeg

e6df24ab94fb8a282eea97f4d5986890.gif

And, Zoe has this film coming out in a month:

fantastic-beasts-where-find-them-movie-poster.jpeg

tumblr_nwi343SQgZ1ubatowo1_400.gif

Now onto why Taylor went to an Eliot Sumner concert (who TF is he?):

He’s a part of Universal Music Group:

IMG_1987.PNG

IMG_1988.PNG

img_197011.png

img_19781.png

p8A4K.gif

Moving onto Tay’s pathetic damage control tour, Tay donated to Louisiana again ughhh:

Taylor Swift has allocated the funds remaining from her $1 million donation to flood relief in Louisiana.

After massive flooding earlier this year, the 26-year-old superstar pledged to give $1 million to causes across the state, which has included schools and food banks.

This month, Taylor donated funds to Convoy of Hope, The Life of a Single Mom and YWCA Greater Baton Rouge as well as $100,000 to Habitat for Humanity, which aims to rebuild 100 homes in Baton Rouge by the end of next year.

“The generous donation from Taylor Swift could not have come at a better time for our organization…Thank you, Taylor Swift, and to all those at the Taylor Swift Foundation, for your kindness and generosity in these challenging times,” YWCA Baton Rouge, said on their website.

Ugh---Guardians-of-the-Galaxy--GIF.gif

Now onto her “visiting” her faux friends Blake Lively & Ryan Reynolds:

Apparently, about 3 days ago, Tay “visited” her faux friends Blake and Ryan in NYC:

Since giving birth to her second child, Blake Lively has been enjoying her private life in upstate New York with husband Ryan Reynolds. Even though she hasn’t been spotted out and about in NYC or Los Angeles doesn’t mean these cities aren’t coming to her! E! News can exclusively reveal that one of Blake’s besties, Taylor Swift , visited the parents of two last weekend.

A source tells us exclusively that the “Style” songstress traveled to Pound Ridge, New York, and spent three or four days with the couple. T. Swift also visited the couple at the hospital shortly after Blake gave birth.

3-4 DAYS WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK AND HOW COME WE NEVER GET PICS OF HER “VISITING” BLAKE AND RYAN LIKE WHAT IS GOING ON FOLKS?

itslikewtf.gif

Also, this dvd just came out for Blake:

Cafe_Society.jpg

9GX5g.gif

Moving on, Tay decided to tease her terrible concert in Austin, Texas oh gosh:

See you this weekend! @cota_official @f1 #USGP

A post shared by Taylor Swift (@taylorswift) on

At rehearsals @cota_official @f1 #USGP

A post shared by Taylor Swift (@taylorswift) on

raw.gif

Moreover, Taylor announced that she’s opening an exhibit in a NYC museum with a lot of her personal items in them wtf ew:

Taylor Swift fans in New York City are in for a treat starting November 18.

From that date through February, museum-goers will be able to indulge themselves in an exhibit curated by the 26-year-old singer herself, featuring items such as handwritten lyrics, the Moonman involved in the famous Kanye West interruption, her elegant Met gala gowns, AND stage costumes from her 1989 World Tour.

The exhibit, called “The Taylor Swift Experience,” started at the Grammy Museum in Los Angeles back in 2014 and is now temporarily switching up its location due to its high demand – it’s the museum’s most popular exhibit of all time, according to Billboard!

Fans can purchase tickets early through Ticketmaster here.

OH GOSH HER IDIOT FANS ARE GONNA PAY FOR THIS SHIT SERIOUSLY

tumblr_ljxwiqE4jo1qj9lxho1_500.gif

Moving on, in New York, Tay decided to close down an entire gym all to herself instead of being the selfless person she claims to be and open it for others:

tumblr_oezxcfQV6l1vxgtrjo1_1280.jpg

REALLY TAY REALLY

tumblr_mkwkmh8hkJ1s8as3do1_500.gif

Oh and we later found out that Tay had a cold and guess what I found out, too:

tumblr_off64vEFE11qdh1c3o1_540.jpg

Yall-Know-What-You-Did-Sip.gif

Later on, Tay performed in Austin and decided to sing her ex-beard’s song This is what you came for:

This Is What You Came For

A post shared by Travis Williams (@traviswilliams) on

WOW SHE SOUNDS TERRIBLE WITH & WITHOUT A COLD

thats-terrible.gif

Moving on, Taylor and her army of skanks decided to make Drake’s birthday about them oh gosh:

39AB8D9800000578-3867398-image-a-96_1477327133177.jpg

39AB8CDF00000578-3867398-image-a-80_1477326838858.jpg

39AC423900000578-3867398-image-m-98_1477327258149.jpg

39AC420C00000578-3867398-image-m-115_1477327797375.jpg

WHY THE HELL ARE ALL THESE BITCHES DRESSED UP AS HOOKERS AND STRIPPERS?

tenor.gif

Funny, how Haim is hanging out with Tay (after not hanging out since July), before this was announced about one of the sisters:

From the album’s co-producers, BloodPop and Mark Ronson, to Josh Homme, Haim bassist Este Haim, Father John Misty, Florence Welch and a number of players in Sharon Jones’ band — not to mention two rock scions (Harper Simon and Sean Lennon) — we took a deep dive into the liner notes of the album, to find out who pitched in on which songs. (All tracks produced by Gaga, BloodPop and Ronson unless otherwise noted.)

raw.gif

Also, about Karlie hanging out with her girlfriend, this was announced about Karlie:

Kloss-20161021030419240.jpg

Online mega-retailer eBay recently teamed up with social influencers, including supermodel Karlie Kloss, to highlight the brand’s focus on new items.

giphy-tumblr.gif

And, about famewhore and terrible Halston Sage (who the fuck is this bitch?) hanging out with Tay, she’s currently promoting this:

If you post wearing this tee @michaelkors will donate 50 meals to children in need! #WatchHungerStop

A post shared by Halston Sage (@halstonsage) on

tumblr_nkknanBR7a1qcjdp7o2_250.gif

And, about why Taylor randomly decided to show up at Drake’s party, this was announced:

IMG_1983.PNG

Also, guess what!? Drake is a Republic Records artist as well!

IMG_1984.PNG

img_19701.png

img_1978.png

img_1979.png

img_1980.png

tumblr_nye7bwqCLz1u5351mo1_500.gif

That’s it for the misadventures of Taylor Alison Swift (for now). Oh gosh, this bitch just keeps stooping to new lows like I don’t know how her stupid ass fans aren’t seeing, but man. But, oh gosh really Taylor? Using Serena and Zoe like that so that you could do damage control like seriously? How do people not see she’s a racist bitch? Also, why do you swifties still like her? Like, it’s obvious she doesn’t care about any of you and she just uses you guys for your money and whatnot. I’m still waiting on how she inspires all of you. Like, how does she inspire you guys? By attacking other woman or refusing to come out of the closet? Like, which one is it guys? Anyway, bye guys and I’ll be back for November to tell you more about the stupid cunt. Bye guys!

tumblr_m5iqimWw7x1qa2mdz.gif