Taylor Swift and Karlie Kloss: Faux Friendship #12

Good afternoon bitches. It’s time for another tale from Queen Taylor Swift’s Faux friendship tales! And today in her faux friendship tales, I’m gonna turn the page onto her faux friendship with her “special friend”, Victoria’s Secret model Karlie Kloss:

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Taylor & Karlie timeline:

Taylor & Karlie 1st met in November 2013 at the 2013 Victoria’s Secret Fashion Show where Karlie was walking the runway and Taylor was performing:

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AWW LOOK AT ALL THE FAUX FRIENDS POSING TOGETHER

After the show, Tay and Karlie didn’t hangout again until March 2014 (wow 4 months what a “friendship”)

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AREN’T THEY JUST THE CUTEST COUPLE I MEAN FAUX FRIENDS

That same month, Karlie and Taylor attended an Oscars after party with Tay’s other faux friend, Jaime King:

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WTF IS TAYLOR DOING WITH HER LEG LMAO

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The next month, Tay and Karlie hungout again:

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LOL AT KARLIE LOOKING AT THE CAMERAS LIKE BITCH WE KNOW U CALLED THEM

They later hungout again all throughout this month lol:

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THEY LOOK LIKE A MORE CONVINCING COUPLE THAN HER & CALVIN LOL

It’s funny how all of this happened before Karlie promoted the new Victoria’s Secret perfume, Heavenly:

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Moving on, Karlie and Taylor were next seen together in May 2014

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THEY BOTH LOOK SO AWKWARD IN THESE PICS LOL

In June, Taylor and Karlie were spotted together not once but twice lol:

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TAY, YOUR SURPRISE FACE IS THE WORST LIKE SERIOUSLY GET A NEW SURPRISE FACE

It’s funny how all these photo ops happened before Karlie appeared in Elle:

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HOW TF IS SHE A MODEL, LIKE SERIOUSLY I CAN MAKE BETTER FACIAL EXPRESSIONS IN MY SLEEP

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In July, we got another Taylor and Karlie sighting:

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KARLIE QUIT LOOKING AT THE CAMERAS BITCH

That same month, they were spotted going to the gym together lol:

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WHY IS TAYLOR DRESSED LIKE A MIME HOOKER GOING TO THE GYM

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Oh, how ironic that all of these photo ops happened a month before Karlie appeared on the cover of Vogue September with Tay’s other faux friend Cara Delevingne:

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Ironically after the cover debuted, Karlie and Tay stepped out for another photo op in September:

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WOW FOR A VS MODEL KARLIE DOESN’T DRESS WELL LOL

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BTW, this photo op happened before Karlie walked the runway at the Balmain show in Paris:

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Moreover, Taylor and Karlie were then seen at a NYC Knicks game in October

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THAT GUY IN THE BACK LOOKS SO ANNOYED BY TAY LOL & POOR BEN STILLER

The next month was great because not only did Karlie name drop Taylor:

“She’s an amazing girl, I’m so proud of her,” she told USA Today. “She works so hard. We’re just normal girls, normal girls.”

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Taylor and Karlie hungout at the 2014 American Music Awards:

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They even went to an AMAS after party with all of their other faux friends:

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KARLIE LOOKS SO OUT OF PLACE LMFAO

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The next month, Tay performed at the VS Fashion show while Karlie walked:

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TAY LOOKS LIKE SHE’S HAVING A FREAKOUT IN THE LAST PIC A LA MISCHA BARTON

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That same month, Tay and Karlie were caught in a comprising position:

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And, as we all know Taylor denied the rumors by calling them, “hilarious”, but I beg to differ bitch

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After the whole scandal, Karlie was seen lip syncing Shake It Off with her fellow VS models:

NONE OF THEM CAN DANCE LMFAO

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Karlie even name dropped Tay in an interview because the VS show was airing the same month:

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Taylor even celebrated her birthday with all of her faux friends including Karlie lol:

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SAM SMITH LOOKS CONFUSED AF IN THESE PICS LOL

It’s funny how all of these events happened not only before the VS show, Karlie was awarded model of the year at the people mag awards lol:

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I WONDER HOW MUCH TAY PAID FOR KARLIE TO WIN THAT TITLE

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Karlie and Tay didnt hangout again until February 2015 (wow 2 months lol)

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TAY & LILY ARE BARELY SMILING IN THIS PIC HAHA

It’s funny how this hangout happened before Karlie’s Joe Fresh Spring Campaign came out 2 days later:

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That same month, Taylor and Karlie covered Vogue lol:

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And had to say about each other:

Taylor on people telling them to be friends: “People had been telling us for years we needed to meet. I remember makeup artists and hair people going, ‘Doesn’t she remind you of Karlie? God, she and Karlie would be best friends. They’re the same. Karlie’s such a good girl. She brings us cookies every time we do a shoot.’”

Karlie on their sisterhood: “I’ve met a lot of really great girls through Taylor. She’s incredible at connecting people who might not normally meet. We’re all in different jobs, but we’ve become strong friends who are there for each other— a sisterhood of girls, a support team. But we’re also just normal 20-something girls, and I think you have to have people that you can be that with. You know, real friends are hard to find — and Taylor’s a real friend. There’s nothing better.”

Taylor on not giving tabloids material on her dating life: “I was really irritated by the whole serial-dater play that people tried to make about me. I just decided I wasn’t willing to provide them that kind of entertainment anymore. I wasn’t going to go out on dates and have them be allowed to take pictures and say whatever they wanted about our body language. I wasn’t going to sit next to somebody and flirt with them for five minutes, because I know the next day he’ll be rumored to be my boyfriend. I just kind of took the narrative back. It’s unfortunate I had to do that. And it’s unfortunate that now I have this feeling like if I were to open myself up to love, that would be a career weakness.”

 

 

LOL AT KARLIE SAYING THAT SHE MET A LOT OF PEOPLE THROUGH TAY SURE U DID

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It’s funny how this Vogue cover happened before Karlie walked the runway at Michael Kors fashion show:

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SHE LOOKS LIKE SHE’S MODELING HER GRANDMA’S CLOTHES

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In May, Karlie’s Bad Blood poster was released (wow they didnt hangout for 3 months lol)

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BITCH LOOKS LIKE A DISCOUNT RONDA ROUSEY

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It’s funny that her Bad Blood poster was released before Karlie threw the first pitch at the Cardinals game:

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After the game, Karlie then went a party with Tay and all of her other faux friends:

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KARLIE NEEDS TO LEARN HOW TO NOT LOOK AT THE CAMERAS OMFG

Oh, how funny that they hungout before Karlie’s Versace Fall/Winter 2015 campaign came out:

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WHY IS SHE WEARING OSCAR THE GROUCH LOL

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In June 2015, Karlie went onstage with Tay’s other faux friends at an 1989 show:

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WHY IS KARLIE DRESSED SO SLUTTY LOL

They even got some backstage pics with Emma Watson & Sydney Sierota from Echosmith:

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WHITE FEMINISTS UNITE!

That same month, Karlie took an awkward pic with Tay, her faux bf Calvin Harris & Gigi & her faux bf Joe Jonas:

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It’s funny how all these hangouts happened before Karlie walked the runway at the Atelier Versace Show during Paris Fashion Week:

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SHE LOOKS LIKE A DISCOUNT HIPPIE LOL

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In July 2015, Karlie went to another 1989 show with Tay’s other faux friends lol:

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WHY DOES KARLIE ALWAYS DRESS BADLY LIKE SERIOUSLY WHAT IS UP WITH THAT

BTW, this concert happened before Karlie did another campaign ad for Joe Fresh:

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The next month, Karlie name dropped Tay once again in Glamour magazine:

On her friendship with Taylor Swift: “Taylor and I met at the Victoria’s Secret Fashion Show two years ago. [Model] Lily Aldridge introduced us. She was like, ‘OK, you two are kindred spirits. How have my two nice American friends never met?’ And that was it….. Our friendship is the same as yours and mine. Many of my closest friends are traveling all the time, so it takes constant effort—texting, FaceTiming—on all ends to maintain close relationships.”

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That same month, Karlie attended the 2015 VMAS with the rest of Tay’s army of skanks:

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THEY LOOK LIKE SUCH TRASHY WHORES OMFG

It’s funny how these events happened before Karlie released a video from her webseries, Klossy lol:

WHO IS SHE TRYING TO BE LIKE? ZOELLA? LOL

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In November, Karlie and Taylor were finally seen together for the 1st time in 3 months:

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KARLIE’S FAKE SURPRISE FACE THOUGH LMFAO

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Oh, how ironic that this event happened before Karlie appeared in Vogue’s 44 Stars You Should Be Watching lol:

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Karlie and Taylor haven’t been seen together since November 2015. Let’s see if Tay and Karlie manage to hangout before the Grammys or if Tay actually brings Karlie to the Grammys instead of Calvin. Like can you imagine that scenario?

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Yay! I’m finally done with this post it took me 15,788 years to get to the end. That’s it for Karlie and Taylor’s love story I mean faux friendship (for now). Tomorrow, I’m gonna dive into Tay’s “friendship” with fellow singer Lorde. Bye for now bitches!

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Taylor Swift & Lily Aldridge: Faux friendship #11

Hey bitches! I’m back with more info about your favorite singer Taylor Allison Swift. And today in Tay’s faux friendship fairytale adventures, I’m gonna talk about her faux friendship with Victoria’s Secret Model, Lily Aldridge, let’s start from the beginning shall we:

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Taylor and Lily timeline:

Taylor and Lily 1st met at the Victoria’s Secret Fashion show back in November 2013 where Taylor was performing and Lily was modeling:

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TAYLOR IS BARELY HOLDING LILY’S HAND LMFAO

Taylor and Lily were next spotted together in March 2014 in NYC (wow they didn’t hangout for a full 4 months lol)

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LILY WE SEE YOU LOOKING AT THE CAMERAS

It’s funny how this photo op happened a month before Lily’s Born Free Africa Campaign came out:

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That same month, Tay & Lily hungout again:

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LILY ISN’T EVEN HOLDING THE STICK RIGHT LOL

Oh how ironic that this hangout happened before the guys choice awards where Lily was accepting an award with her fellow models, Nina Agdal, and Chrissy Teigen:

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In November-December 2014 we got a lot of Taylor & Lily pics (wow they didn’t hangout for 7 months what kind of “friendship” is that haha):

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But, let’s not get ahead of ourselves just quite yet, remember this event was happening while this was all going on:

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AND LOOK WHO PERFORMED DURING THE SHOW:

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Taylor and Lily were then spotted in Nashville in February 2015

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IS IT THE BOTOX OR IS LILY JUST THAT BAD AT FAKE SMILING

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BTW, this Nashville hangout happened before Lily’s Maxim cover came out a month later:

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WTF IS WRONG WITH HER LIPS ON THIS COVER

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The next month, Tay and Lily hungout at a party

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ALL OF THESE PARTIES THEY GO TO ALWAYS HAVE STUPID THEMES LIKE WTF

That same month, Lily name dropped Taylor in an interview:

“Taylor makes me dinner, and she’s the sweetest, most humble girl I’ve ever met.”

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The next month, Lily released her Bad Blood poster:

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SHE LOOKS LIKE A STUPID ESKIMO HHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA

That same month, Lily attended the Billboard Music Awards with Tay and her other faux friends because the bad blood music video was premiering that same night:

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WHY THE SAD FACE LILY

It’s funny how this event happened before the Maxim Hot 100 list came out and look who made the list:

Taylor Swift
Jennifer Lawrence
Sienna Miller
Emma Stone
Felicity Jones
Phoebe Tonkin
Abbey Lee Kershaw
Bella Heathcote
Isabel Lucas
Daisy Ridley
Tatiana Maslany
Lupita Nyong’o
Gugu Mbatha-Raw
Emilia Clarke
Léa Seydoux
Monica Bellucci
Lily Collins
Zoë Kravitz
Tao Okamoto
Scarlett Johansson
Zooey Deschanel
Angelina Jolie
Brie Larson
Lola Kirke
Alexis Bledel
Imogen Poots
Amber Heard
Dakota Johnson
Margot Robbie
Elizabeth Olsen
Gal Gadot
Hayley Atwell
Kate Mara
Shay Mitchell
Nina Dobrev
Lana Del Rey
Kacey Musgraves
Kimberly Perry
Maddie & Tae
Jana Kramer
Rita Ora
Selena Gomez
Victoria Justice
Victoria Beckham
Kelela
Ana Tijoux
Ellie Rowsell
Tove Lo
Sofia Reyes
Soko
Charli XCX
Ariana Grande
SZA
FKA twigs
Banks
Tinashe
Teresa Palmer
Jessica Hart
Miranda Kerr
Isabeli Fontana
Edita Vilkeviciute
Ana Beatriz Barros
Andreea Diaconu
Jourdan Dunn
Candice Swanepoel
Lily Aldridge

I WONDER HOW MUCH TAYLOR AND LILY PAID MAXIM TO MAKE THE LIST

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Tay and Lily were next spotted together at 2 of Tay’s 1989 shows:

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WTF IS LILY WEARING IN THESE 2 PICS LOL

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It’s funny how all of these events happened before Lily appeared in Net-a-Porter’s The Edit magazine:

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Lily even name dropped Tay in her interview with the mag:

“Taylor just loves her friends, and so do I. My girls are my girls. We’re such a close-knit group of women, and the most special thing about our group of friends – and it extends so far – is that we all have each other’s backs. It’s about supporting and being happy for each other. When you lift up the people around you, it elevates you as well. Bringing everybody up is the way I hope the whole world changes.”

 

 

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That same month, Lily attended the 2015 VMAS with Tay and all of her other faux friends:

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LILY LOOK HAPPY! YOU’RE AT THE VMAS FOR PETE’S SAKE!

It’s funny how all of this happened before Lily walked the runway at the Carolina Herrera show at New York Fashion week a month later:

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2 months later, Lily and Taylor were spotted together again with Tay’s other faux friends:

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WHY DOES LILY LOOK HIGH AF IN THIS PIC

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It’s funny how this event happened a month before Lily’s Stuart Weitzman Campaign came out:

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The 2015 Victoria’s Secret Fashion Show

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And the Victoria’s Secret 2015 holiday commercial came out:

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Taylor and Lily haven’t been seen together since November 2015. What kind of “friendship” was this like seriously they mostly hungout during the Victoria’s Secret shows when Tay was paid to perform and Lily was paid to walk the runway.

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That’s it for the Tay and Lily saga. Tomorrow is a special one, because I’m gonna talk about Tay and her “special friend” Victoria’s Secret model Karlie Kloss’s friendship. Bye bitches!

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Taylor Swift and Hayley Williams: Faux Friendship #10

Hello bitches. It’s time to wake up and smell the roses because I have a new post about pop princess Taylor Swift’s faux friendships. In Queen Tay’s faux friendship tales I’m gonna turn the page onto her “friendship” with Paramore lead singer Hayley Williams, let’s get this party started shall we:

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Taylor and Hayley timeline:

Taylor and Hayley 1st met at a Grammy party back in 2008

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IS HAYLEY DRUNK IN THESE PICS HAHA

It’s funny how they hungout before Paramore released That’s What You Get:

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and Taylor released Should’ve Said No:

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SONY SHOULD’VE CALMED IT DOWN WITH THE PHOTOSHOPPING OMFG

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We didn’t hear about Tay and Hay again until Sept.2009 when Hayley defended Taylor when Kanye West interrupted her at the 2009 VMAS:

“Taylor swift, y’all. #TeamTaylor.”

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It’s funny how Hayley defended Taylor before this album got released:

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3 months later, Taylor and Hayley hungout at Hayley’s birthday party:

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SHE LOOKS SO AWKWARD WHILE ROLLING SKATING LMFAO

It’s funny how this birthday party happened before the release of these 2 singles:

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In April 2010, Tay and Hay attended a wedding together (wow they didn’t hangout for a full 3 months lol):

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TAYLOR AND HAYLEY CAN BARELY FAKE SMILE LMFAO

Oh, how ironic that this wedding happened before Taylor was announced as the new CoverGirl:

Taylor Swift: CoverGirl’s New Face!

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Taylor Swift is the new face for CoverGirl‘s yet-to-be-revealed product line, which will debut next year.

“I’m a huge makeup junkie,” the 20-year-old country cutie tells WWD. “[I opt for] anything sparkly or bright colored or shiny. I like a natural look in my everyday life, when I’m going to the grocery store or hanging out at my house in Nashville. When I go on stage, I get to play with my look…You get to play around with all these different characters, and I think that’s one of my favorite things about makeup – you can put on a new character.”

Previous CoverGirls include Queen Latifah, Rihanna, Drew Barrymore, Ellen DeGeneres and Dania Ramirez.

and Hayley’s music video for the song Airplanes featuring B.O.B came out:

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Once again, Hay and Tay didn’t hangout again until Sept. 2011 (wow they almost didn’t hangout for a full year omg haha) when Tay invited Hay up onstage with her during 1 of her Speak Now shows:

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BTW, this event happened before the release of these 2 singles:

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In March 2013, while Hayley was promoting Still Into You, Paramore’s new single, she decided to namedrop Tay:

“And I don’t see Taylor Swift as much, but sometimes when I’m just lounging at the movies, I see Brad Paisley and his wife.”

WOW I THOUGHT YOU 2 WERE BEST FRIENDS HAYLEY WHAT HAPPENED

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In late 2014, Taylor and Hayley became “friends” again just so Hayley could promote Tay’s magazine cover lol:

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TAY LOOKS LIKE A GUY FROM THE 90S I CAN’T LOL

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It’s funny how all of this was happening before Paramore released the deluxe version of their self titled album:

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Paramore even did an interview with MuchMusic in Canada and Hayley once again name dropped Taylor:

 

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Hayley even announced her engagement 

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and guess who decided to make it all about her? Yep, you guessed it.

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It’s funny how this all happened before the Grammys and guess who won one?

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I WONDER HOW MUCH TAY PAID FOR THEIR GRAMMY

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Tay and Hay were seen together once again when they went to Camila Cabello’s birthday party:

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TAY LOOK MORE ENTHUSIASTIC OMFG

After they went to the birthday party, Hayley announced that she was hosting a new online show:

HAYLEY WILLIAMS TO HOST A NEW ONLINE TV SHOW

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Hayley Williams: musician, role model and now TV show host!

The vocal powerhouse revealed in a new blog post that she will be the host of a new online TV show called ‘Kiss-Off,’ a beauty-focussed video series.

According to Hayley, the show is about encouraging people, especially young people, that perfection is not what makes beauty. Getting to know yourself through your inspirations, painting your personality across your face, and enjoying the process of self-expression.”

An except from Hayley’s blog regarding her latest venture can be found below.

The 2nd thing I’ve been working on was just announced last week, although it would’ve been easy to miss if you weren’t glued to the computer, or the Twitter, as I am pretty much daily. I’m going to be hosting an internet show about beauty looks and makeup and personal inspiration. The show is called Kiss-Off and it’s part of the new online zine/community called Popular that my friend Marvin Scott Jarrett, who co-founded Nylon Magazine (MAYBE YOU’VE HEARD OF IT), just launched. It’s a little bit unbelievable that I bumped into him while grocery shopping in LA last summer and not even a year later I get to be a part of his new project. I’m super excited about it. You’re really going to see how much of a nerd I am… and hopefully you’ll get to see how widespread my influences and inspirations are. The show is NOT a show about “how to get pretty” or “this is how you should look!”. It’s really about encouraging people, especially young people, that perfection is not what makes beauty. Getting to know yourself through your inspirations, painting your personality across your face, and enjoying the process of self-expression… that’s what is beautiful. The best part is, I get to bring Brian O’Connor (my best friend of about 10 years/the boy wonder who makes me look alive on the road & in videos) along for the ride. We shot a few episodes already and I’m sure we’ll shoot some more once we’re on the road. Hopefully, you won’t think we are complete losers. You probably will. Oh well.

LIKE ANYBODY’S GONNA WATCH THAT SHIT HAYLEY

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Also, the nominees for the Alternative Press Music Awards were announced and guess who was nominated?

Nominations for Best Vocalist

Tyler Carter (Issues)
Vic Fuentes (Pierce The Veil)
Lynn Gunn (PVRIS)
Adam Lazzara (Taking Back Sunday)
Jeremy McKinnon (A Day To Remember)
Hayley Williams (Paramore)

Nominations for Best Live Band
presented by Macbeth

A Day To Remember
letlive.
Panic! At The Disco
Paramore
twenty one pilots
The Wonder Years

Nominations for Most Dedicated Fans
presented by Fearless Records

All Time Low (Hustlers)
Crown The Empire (The Runaways)
Fall Out Boy (Overcast Kids)
Motionless In White (Creatures)
Paramore (Parafamily)
twenty one pilots (Skeleton Clique)

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In April, Hayley and Taylor hungout with Tay’s brother Austin and all of her other faux friends:

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THEY ALL LOOK LIKE CIRCUS FREAKS LMFAO

That same month, Hayley was spotted on the set of Bad Blood in L.A.

 

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Then a month later, the RELENTLESS KERRANG! Award nominations came out and look who was nominated:

TWEETER OF THE YEAR

Mark Hoppus – blink-182
Andy Biersack – Black Veil Brides
Gerard Way
Hayley Williams – Paramore
Jono Yates – Blitz Kids

TWEETER OF THE YEAR WTF LOL

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Later on, Hayley’s Bad Blood poster was released:

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SHE’S NOT EVEN TRYING TO LOOK REMOTELY BADASS I CAN’T HAHA

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Then a day before the Bad Blood video dropped, Hayley decided to talk about the 1st time she met Tay:

“We actually met at this Grammy party … and [Taylor Swift’s] mom came up to us [Paramore] and was like, ’It’s so nice to meet you guys, you’ve got to meet my daughter,’ … I think we exchanged numbers, and we started hanging out in Nashville not too long after that,” Williams said about her friendship with Taylor.

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It’s not only ironic that Hayley talked about Taylor the day the video dropped, she also name dropped her before the Kerrang! Awards where Hayley won for best tweeter lol:

TWEETER OF THE YEAR

Hayley Williams, Paramore

The 2015 APMAS where Hayley won for best vocalist:

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WHY IS THERE A CARE BEAR GROWING ON HER HEAD

and the release of New Found Glory’s Vicious Love featuring Hayley herself:

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Hayley and Taylor haven’t hungout since April 2015. Wow, they haven’t hungout for almost a year, such a great “friendship”. Let’s see if Tay includes Hay back in her squad after Paramore releases a new album or song.

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Well, I guess the chapter is closed on Taylor and Hayley’s faux friendship (for now I guess). Tune in tomorrow to hear me talk about Tay’s “friendship” with Victoria’s Secret model Lily Aldridge. Sayonara Bitches!

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Taylor Swift and Zendaya: Faux friendship #9

Hey everybody! I’m so sorry for the late post again, I’ve been sick for the last week and it sucks. But what doesn’t suck is this post about Queen Taylor Swift’s faux friends and today in her faux friendship tales I’m gonna talk about her “friendship” with Disney star Zendaya. Let’s get started shall we:

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Taylor and Zendaya timeline:

In April 2015, Zendaya was spotted on the set of the Bad Blood video in L.A.

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SHE LOOKS CONFUSED LOL

The next month her Bad Blood poster was released

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That same month, Zendaya attended the Billboard Music Awards with Tay and all her other faux friends because the stupid music video was premiering that night:

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ZENDAYA’S FAKE SMILE IN ALL THESE PICS I CAN’T

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After that, Zendaya opened up about Tay and the Bad Blood video lol:

“She’s just a genius,” Zendaya told Entertainment Tonight. “She’s so smart. People are going to be blown and are going to be obsessed with [the video]. I don’t know how they’re going to think about anything else!”

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OH GOSH HOW MUCH DID TAY PAY ZENDAYA TO SAY THAT BS LOL

It’s funny how after Zendaya appeared in the video and went to the award show with Tay and all her other faux friends, Zendaya released a new song called Neverland:

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The next month, Zendaya graduated from High School:

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and Taylor decided to make it all about herself and tweet this:

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It’s funny how this graduation thing happened before Zendaya received the Empathy Rockstar Award at the Children Mending Heart’s 2015 Empathy Rocks Fundraiser:

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In August, Zendaya was spotted at Tay’s L.A. concert (wow they didn’t hangout for a full month lol):

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NICE FAKE SMILE U GOT THERE ZENDAYA

A few days later this was announced:

Zendaya to Guest Star on ABC’s ‘Black-ish’

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Zendaya is headed to another TV show this Fall!

According to People, the 18-year-old actress/singer just landed a guest-starring role on ABC’s Black-ish!

Z will play Resheida, who is a friend of Zoey’s (Yara Shahidi).

“Since Resheida doesn’t have a father, she immediately takes to Emmy nominee Anthony Anderson‘s Dre, agreeing with his belief that all dads should be respected,” the mag reports.

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The next month, Zendaya was asked about whether or not she’s seen Taylor in a while lol:

“Honestly, the only time I’ve hung out with her is during her video. I haven’t actually hung out with her that much,” Zendaya told us. “I think the cool thing is that any time I was ever around her when we did hang out, she was super-duper nice to myself, to my parents, and to anyone who was with me. She made me feel very comfortable. She made sure I was taken care of, and that’s really cool.”

She continued, “That’s really cool to see because someone like that—who is very powerful in the music industry—she doesn’t need to be nice. She’s really, really sweet. I really appreciated that.”

SO SHE BASICALLY ADMITTED THAT THEY WERE ONLY JUST FAKE FRIENDS LMAO

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P.S. I WAS A LITTLE NICE WITH THIS ONE BECAUSE ZENDAYA IS THE ONLY FAUX FRIEND OF TAY’S THAT I LIKE

I also forgot to mention what record label Zendaya is a part of:

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And, never forget about what record label(s) Taylor is a part of:

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Well, that’s it for the Taylor and Zendaya chapter. Tomorrow, I’m gonna talk about Tay’s faux friendship with Paramore lead singer Hayley Williams. I’d also like to thank you guys for viewing and reading my posts! You guys are amazing! See ya!

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Taylor Swift & Cara Delevingne: Faux friendship #8

Rise and shine bitches. It’s morning and it’s time for another post about America’s Sweetheart Taylor Swift’s faux friendships. Today in her faux friendship tales, I’m gonna dive into her faux friendship with model cokewhore turned terrible actress Cara Delevingne:

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Taylor and Cara timeline:

In February 2014, Taylor and Cara were 1st spotted together singing with Tay’s fellow faux friend Ed Sheeran in an Instagram video:

OH DEAR THAT SINGING

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Tay and Cara were seen together again in February along with Tay’s other faux friend Ellie Goulding lol

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THEY ALL LOOK UGLY WHEN THEY MAKE THOSE FACIAL EXPRESSIONS OH MY LOL

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After Cara hungout with Tay twice, she launched her Mulberry Bag collection:

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Taylor and Cara didn’t hangout again until 2 months later haha

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TAY QUIT LOOKING AT THE CAMERAS! DON’T LET THEM KNOW U CALLED THEM

It’s funny how they hungout before Burberry released a teaser video of Cara and fellow model Suki Waterhouse modeling their jackets:

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Taylor and Cara didn’t hangout again until December 2014 (wow they didn’t hangout for 8 months what kind of “friendship” is this lol) when Cara was spotted leaving Tay’s NYC apartment with fellow model Kendall Jenner:

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WHY ARE THEY DRESSED LIKE HOMELESS PEOPLE LOL

15 days after Cara was spotted leaving Taylor’s apartment with Kendall, their Love Magazine’s Advent 2014 video was released:

WTF ARE THEY DOING IN THIS VIDEO LMAO

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Tay and Cara weren’t seen together again until April 2015 when Cara was spotted on the set of the Bad Blood music video:

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CARA, BUCKY BARNES DID THE RACOON LOOK BETTER

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It’s funny how this photo op happened a month before Warner Brothers released the 1st official Suicide Squad pic and look who’s in it:

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That same month in May, Cara released her Bad Blood poster:

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WHY DOES SHE LOOK LIKE AN IDIOT HOOKER

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A few days after her poster was released, JustJared released a behind the scenes video of the Paper Towns (Cara’s film) photoshoot featuring her, Nat Wolff and John Green:

SERIOUSLY HOW IS THIS BITCH A MODEL LIKE I CAN MODEL BETTER THAN SHE CAN

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Taylor and Cara weren’t seen together again until June 2015 when she invited Cara and Law & Order SVU star Mariska Hargitay to sing with her during one of her 1989 shows:

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Oh, how ironic that this event happened before Cara’s Vogue came out:

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Cara once again went to another one of Tay’s 1989 shows with all of her other faux friends:taylor-swift-friends-01.jpg

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IS CARA TRYING TO HIT TAYLOR WITH THE UK FLAG IN THE 2ND PIC LOL

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Oh, and I forgot to mention that this event happened before the release of this teaser trailer:

SHE LOOKS SO TERRIBLE AS ENCHANTRESS LIKE NO

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Also during the same month, Cara was being rude to interviewers because Paper Towns flopped lol:

BITCH IT’S NOT THEIR FAULT THAT THE FILM FLOPPED SO SHUT THE FUCK UP CARA

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The next month, Cara attended the 2015 VMAS with Tay and her other faux friends:

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It’s funny how Cara went to the VMAS with Tay and her other faux friends before the release of this film:

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AND LOOK WHO’S ONE OF THE MERMAIDS IN THE FILM:

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BTW THIS FILM ALSO FLOPPED SO 2 FLOPS IN A ROW NOT A GOOD START CARA

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In November, Taylor invited Cara and her other faux friends over to her house just show she could brag about her bought VMA moonmen lol:

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A month after all these fake bitches hungout together, Cara released her Love Magazine‘s Advent campaign video:

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Cara and Taylor haven’t been seen together since November 2015. Let’s see if Cara manages to hangout with Taylor before Suicide Squad comes out in August. So, Cara you better hurry before August.

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That’s it for the Cara and Taylor chronicles. Tomorrow, starts the Zendaya saga. In the meantime, I just posted about Tay and Selena’s recent hangouts, you should read them they’re really interesting. Bye guys and be prepared for tomorrow’s post.

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The truth behind Taylor and Selena’s recent hangouts

Hello everyone I’m back to post about Tay’s faux friendships. But, I’m about to talk about her faux friendship with Selena Gomez again. I bet you guys are wondering why I’m going back to the Selena chapter and this is why:

On January 16th, Taylor put this picture on Instagram with Selena and the hashtag, “Are we out of the woods yet?”

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THEY ALWAYS MAKE AWFUL EXPRESSIONS OH GOSH HAHA

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2 days later, the 2 were spotted at the gym lol

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WHY SO SAD BITCHES?

And, then the next day this trailer came out and look who’s in it

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AND HOW DID SELENA GET CAST IN NEIGHBORS 2 LIKE WHOSE DICK DID SHE SUCK

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Also, this little song is about to hit the airwaves in 6 days

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Well that’s it for the misadventures of Tay and Sel (for now). Wow, 2 post in 1 day I’m good haha. But, tomorrow the Cara post is coming and it’s gonna be as addictive and crazy as Cara’s drug problem. Bye bitches!

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Taylor Swift and Martha Hunt: Faux friendship #7

Hey bitches guess what time it is? It’s time for another blog post about your favorite pop princess Taylor Allison Swift and today in her faux friendship adventures, I’m gonna talk about her faux friendship with Victoria’s Secret Model Martha Hunt so let’s get it started shall we:

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Taylor and Martha timeline:

Taylor and Martha 1st met when Taylor performed at the Victoria’s Secret Fashion back in December 2013

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MARTHA LOOKS LIKE SHE’S STALKING TAYLOR LOL

The 2 later hungout again in December 2014 (wow they didn’t hangout for a year lol) when Tay performed at the VS Show for the 2nd year in a row

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IT’S FUNNY THAT AT 1ST TAY & MARTHA ONLY HUNGOUT AT VS SHOWS BECAUSE TAY WAS PERFORMING THERE LOL

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Then, after the VS Show Taylor took Martha and fellow faux friend/model Lily Aldridge to see her then faux boyfriend Matt Healy’s band The 1975

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MARTHA AND LILY LOOK DRUNK LOL

It’s funny how this event happened a few days before this event was showing on TV

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In April 2015, Victoria’s Secret named their 10 new angels and guess who was on the list?

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WTF IS SHE DOING IN THIS GIF LOL

and this was released a month after Martha was named an angel

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KATNISS DID THE SIDE BRAID BETTER MARTHA

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That same month in May, Martha attended the Billboard Music Awards with Tay and her other faux friends because the Bad Blood music video was premiering the same night:

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WHY DOES MARTHA LOOK LIKE SHE’S LAUGHING LIKE A HYENA

LIKE

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IS SHE LAUGHING ABOUT THE HORRIBLE MUSIC VIDEO OR TAY’S OUTFIT

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Later on, Martha did a photo op with Taylor and her other faux friend Gigi in NYC

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LOVE HOW MARTHA IS LOOKING AT THE CAMERAS LOL

The next day Martha did another photo op with Tay

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WHY DOES TAYLOR ALWAYS LIKE TO DRESS LIKE A CLOWN HOOKER LOL

Taylor then invited Martha and Gigi to sing with her onstage during one of her 1989 shows:

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MARTHA DON’T POSE LIKE THAT LIKE NO

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Tay next invited Martha and the rest of her faux friends to another 1989 show lol

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Martha then went to Taylor’s 4th of July party with all of her other faux friends

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NICE FAKE SMILE YOU GOT THERE MARTHA

I find it funny how all of this happened before Victoria’s Secret released behind the scenes pics from the Holiday Campaign shoot:

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Before Martha promoted the launch of the all-new Body by Victoria Campaign in NYC with her fellow angels:

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And, the debut of Martha’s Hamptons Mag Cover:

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In the mag, Martha name dropped Tay because ofc that’s what all of her untalented faux friends do:

And Taylor Swift—I can’t say enough good things about her. I admire her so much as a person and as a role model for young women. I think we need more people like her; people who want to bring women together and not oversexualize themselves. Plus, she’s talented, and she’s just the best.”

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Next month, Martha went to the VMAS 2015 with Tay and her army of skanks:

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Also, the VMAS happened a month before Martha walked the runway at the Carolina Herrera show:

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Tay and Martha haven’t been seen together since August 2015. Wow, all of these “friendships” are dropping like flies aren’t they?

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Tomorrow, I’m gonna write about Taylor and that little drug addict or as the world knows her as Cara Delevingne. Oh and BTW I’m gonna also write about Taylor and Selena’s recent hangouts. I may post it later tonight or tomorrow, I’m gonna see. In the meantime, bye guys!

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Taylor Swift and Ellie Goulding: Faux Friendship #6

Hello friends! What a glorious day it is for another post about your favorite pop princess Taylor Swift! Today in Queen Tay’s Fairytale faux friendships tales, I’m gonna turn the page onto her faux friendship with horrible singer Ellie Goulding, here goes nothing:

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Taylor and Ellie timeline:

In February 2013, Taylor and Ellie were first spotted talking at a BRIT Awards after party:

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WHY ARE THEY ALL FAKE LAUGHING WITH EACH OTHER LOL

2 months after they were spotted hanging out together at the after party, Ellie released the music video for I Need Your Love featuring Tay’s faux boyfriend Calvin Harris:

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Then, Taylor and Ellie weren’t seen again together until August when Taylor invited Ellie up onstage to sing Anything Could Happen during one of her Red shows:

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TAY YOUR CAMELTOE IS SHOWING!

And then 2 months later, Ellie released the music video for her song How Long Will I Love You:

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Later on, Tay and Ellie didn’t hangout again lol until February 2014 when Taylor invited Ellie once again to sing with her onstage in London:taylor-swift-ellie-goulding-perform-burn-in-london-watch-now-03.jpg

BOTH OF THEIR CAMELTOES ARE SHOWING LOL

That same month, Taylor took a pic with Ellie just show she could show off her new haircut  oh dear haha:

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SHE’S BARELY PUTTING HER ARM AROUND HER I’M CACKLING HAHA

Tay later showed off her new haircut again with Ellie and her other faux friend Cara Delevingne:

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AWFUL, FAKE & EXAGGERATED FACIAL EXPRESSIONS! OH MY!

It’s funny how all these hangouts happened before Ellie took the stage at the BRIT Awards:

MY DEAR SHE SOUNDS AWFUL LIVE

and she released her song for the film Divergent titled Beating Heart:

 

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Continuing on this faux friendship, Taylor and Ellie didn’t hangout until November 2014 when Tay brought Ellie and her other faux friend Selena Gomez to go see her then faux boyfriend Matt Healy’s band The 1975:

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THESE GIRLS ARE TERRIBLE AT BEING FAKE HAPPY LOL

2 months later after their outing, Ellie released her terrible song for the film 50 Shades Of Grey titled Love Me Like You Do:

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In April 2015, Tay and Ellie were spotted hanging out together for the 1st time in 2015 lol:

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C’MON ELLIE GIVE US A SMILE! YOU’RE TAY’S BFF YOU’RE SUPPOSED TO SMILE!

The next month, Ellie’s Bad Blood poster was released:

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FOR SUCH A BADASS THEME NONE OF THESE GIRLS LOOK REMOTELY BADASS

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It’s funny how all these events happened before Ellie’s Elle UK came out a month later:

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In the mag, Ellie name dropped Taylor because that’s what all of her fake friends do:

“I find it so frustrating that female musicians are constantly defined by the men they have or haven’t dated. It’s something I’ve talked about with Taylor a lot. She definitely feels that. She gets bothered by it. It’s like, you can be a great artist, you can write great songs, but the thing that everyone is going to talk about is some relationship they think you have had or not had. It’s definitely something we both think happens to female artists over male artists.”

 

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In June 2015, Ellie announced that she set up Taylor and Calvin lol:

Ellie Goulding Played Matchmaker for Pals Taylor Swift & Calvin Harris

 

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“I did play matchmaker, that’s true,” Ellie told The Sun (via Elle). “Calvin is a really great mate and he’s so fantastic, and Taylor is such a cool person who I love. I thought, ‘They’re both really awesome and both really tall. They’ll be brilliant together.’”

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Like I said in the Calvin Harris post, Ellie never introduced Calvin and Taylor, it was Taylor’s publicist Tree. Ellie was only saying that because not only did they need a backstory about how they met, 2 days later it was announced that she was the new face of M.A.C  Cosmetics:

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WHY IS SHE TRYING TO BE LIKE MADONNA? LOL.

And, she was releasing a song called Powerful featuring Major Lazer and Tarrus Riley:

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In October 2015, Tay invited Ellie up onstage with during one of her 1989 shows to sing Love Me Like You Do:

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TAY NEEDS TO STOP WEARING OUTFITS THAT SHOW OFF HER CAMELTOE OMG

5 days later, Ellie releases her new song titled Lost and Found:

 

OH GOSH THIS SONG IS TERRIBLE JUST LIKE ALL HER OTHER ONES

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Taylor and Ellie haven’t been seen together since October 2015. Let’s see if Ellie manages to hangout with Tay before the Grammys next month.

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That’s it for the Taylor and Ellie saga. Tomorrow, the Martha Hunt post is coming and it’s gonna 10x bigger than Tay’s nonexistent ass. Goodnight bitches, sleep tight and be prepared for tomorrow’s post.

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Taylor Swift and Gigi Hadid: Faux friendship #5

Hey guys! Guess what? I’m about to give you a new post about your favorite pop princess Taylor Swift. And today in Tay’s faux friendship adventures, I’m gonna talk about her “friendship” with model Gigi Hadid. So, here it goes.

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In December 2014, Taylor was spotted putting up Christmas decorations in her NYC apartment with models Gigi Hadid and Kendall Jenner via Gigi’s Instagram:

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After Gigi put that Instagram video up, her Love’s Advent Calendar video was released about 2 weeks later:

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In May 2015, Gigi’s Bad Blood poster was released:

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WHAT KIND OF NAME IS SLAY-Z LIKE WTF HAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHA

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Later in May, Gigi and Tay’s other fake friends were spotted going to her NYC apartment:

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GIGI WE SEE YOU LOOKING AT THE CAMERAS

That same month, Gigi, Tay and her army of skanks all had a photo op lunch in NYC:

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HOW TF ARE SOME OF THESE BITCHES MODELS LIKE SERIOUSLY

The next day, they all stepped out for another photo op in NYC

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I WONDER WHICH ONE OF THEM CALLED THE PAPS LOL

The next night lol, Taylor invited Gigi to sing with her onstage at one of her 1989 concerts:

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GIGI CALM DOWN! YOUR THIRSTYNESS IS SHOWING!

The next month, Gigi went to Taylor’s other fake friend’s Jaime’s baby shower:

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THEY ALL LOOK LIKE THEY’RE FROM AHS FREAKSHOW LOL

That same month, Gigi and Taylor had dinner with Gigi’s new “boyfriend” Joe Jonas lol:

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JOE LOOKS SO DONE LOL

BTW, in case you forgot Taylor and Joe used to date and when they broke up, Taylor filmed this infamous video lol:

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Oh, and let me just tell you all of these events happened before Gigi’s magazine cover with her sister Bella came out:

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Oh and Gigi was cast in Calvin Harris’s (Tay’s faux boyfriend) music video:

Squad up! The bonds between Taylor Swift’s loved ones are just getting stronger.

Swift’s boyfriend, Calvin Harris, will up with one of her besties, Gigi Hadid, for his new “How Deep Is Your Love” music video.

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Later in June, Gigi was seen with Taylor everywhere lol

From her concert in London:

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THEY ALL DRESS TERRIBLY FOR SUCH “PRETTY” GIRLS LOL

To hanging out on a boat with their faux boyfriends and Karlie:

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THIS PHOTO IS STILL AWKWARD TO THIS DAY HAHA

In July, Gigi attended Tay’s fourth of July party with all her other faux friends:

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It’s funny how this fourth of July event happened before Gigi’s Vouge Brazil cover was released:

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Oh and the next day, Gigi got nominated for a Teen Choice Award for Choice model lol:

Choice Model

Cara Delevingne
Gigi Hadid
Hailey Baldwin
Karlie Kloss
Kendall Jenner
Robyn Lawley

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That same month, Gigi went to not one but two of Tay’s 1989 concerts:

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LOVE HOW GIGI IS STANDING FAR AWAY FROM THE GROUP IN THE 2ND PIC LMAO

A few days after Gigi went to these 1989 shows, her Balmain Ad Campaign came out:

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SHE LITERALLY MAKES THE SAME EXPRESSION IN ALL OF HER MODELING PICS LIKE WTF

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In August, Taylor released Gigi’s behind the scenes vid from Bad Blood:

The next day, Gigi’s Vanity Fair video was released:

And guess who was on the cover of Vanity Fair during that month?

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That same month, Gigi “threw” Joe a birthday party and invited Taylor lol:

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I LOVE ALL THESE PEOPLE SURE JOE SURE

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Later on, Gigi was forced to take Joe to another one of Tay’s 1989 concerts lol:

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THEY LOOK SO HAPPY TO BE THERE LOL

Gigi later talked about how many times she’s seen Tay live:

It seems like Gigi has finally lost count of how many of Taylor‘s shows she’s attended!

“…don’t know how many 1989 shows I’ve seen at this point, but I still belt every word and feel so proud every second,” she tweeted after the show.

She also mentioned how proud she was that Taylor got her very own banner in the venue for having the most sold out shows there ever saying, “I grew up a @Lakers super-fan & tonight my friend @taylorswift13 got a banner in the Staples Center presented to her by Kobe. Life, made.”

 

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Later that same month, Gigi attended the 2015 VMAS with Taylor’s other faux friends:

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THEY ALL LOOK LIKE A CROSS BETWEEN HOOKERS AND STRIPPERS LOL

Oh, and I forgot to mention that all of these events happened a month before Gigi took the runway at New York Fashion Week:

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That same month, Gigi talked about being a part of Taylor’s faux friends group in Elle Canada:

“We want to be the generation and the group of friends known for supporting each other. ‘Squad Goals’ is a big social-media thing right now, and that’s what we want to inspire in other groups of friends—to be proud of the power you all have when you’re together, which can be amplified so much by each person.”

WTF IS THIS BITCH EVEN TALKING ABOUT OMG LOL

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Gigi and Taylor didn’t hangout again until November lol

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And about a week later, it was announced that Gigi was joining Michael Buble for his annual Christmas special:

Michael Bublé is getting some help for some very famous friends for his annual NBC holiday special. Some would even call them super—super models that is. Gigi Hadid and Kylie Jenner are set to join Bublé for Michael Bublé’s Christmas in Hollywood on Thursday, Dec. 10 at 8 p.m. on NBC.

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Gigi and Taylor haven’t been seen together since November. I guess another “friendship” bit the dust, huh Tay? Like, seriously do you even have any real friends? Lol.

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Tomorrow, I’m gonna write about Tay’s faux friendship with equally horrible singer Ellie Goulding. In the meantime, I’d like to thank you guys for reading my blog and making my views go up! You’re the best! Bye guys!

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Taylor Swift and Serayah Mcneill: faux frienship #4

Hey, guys I’m back! So sorry about the delay on the post, so much shit has been happening over these past few days. But, I’m back with more info about pop princess Taylor Swift’s faux friendships and today I’m gonna talk about her faux friendship with Empire actress Serayah Mcneill, let’s get started bitches:

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Taylor and Serayah timeline:

In April 2015, Taylor was spotted hanging out with Serayah and her other fake friends:

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BTW, Taylor started hanging out with Serayah after Empire premiered on Fox

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Next month, Taylor and Serayah had a photo op lunch

 

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GEEZ WHO KEEPS CALLING ALL THESE PAPARAZZOS OH WAIT I KNOW WHO:

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This photo op also happened before Serayah’s Bad Blood poster was released:

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BTW, after Serayah’s Bad Blood poster was released she released a new song:

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Later that same month, Serayah attended the Billboard Music Awards with Taylor and her other fake friends:

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OH DEAR THEIR FAKE FACIAL EXPRESSIONS I CAN’T

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The Bad Blood music video also premiered that same night:

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THAT’S IRONIC THAT HER NAME IS CATASTROPHE BECAUSE SHE IS ONE

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Taylor and Serayah didn’t hangout again until July 4th lol

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WTF IS UP WITH THOSE JUMP POSES LOL

A few days later, Taylor invited Serayah to sing onstage with her during one of her 1989 concerts:

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THEY LOOK LIKE CLOWN HOOKERS LOL

It’s funny how all of this occurred before Fox released the trailer for s2 of Empire:

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In August, Serayah attended the 2015 VMAS with Taylor and her other fake friends:

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WHY ARE THEY ALL DRESSED LIKE WHORES HAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHA

Don’t forget that the VMAS were a month before the season premiere of this show:

 

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Oh and speaking of Empire, look what I found out about the show:

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And, never forget this little detail:

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The next month, Serayah name dropped Taylor not once but twice while promoting Empire:

“I was driving, and my mum called me, saying, ‘So guess who just called me? Taylor Swift!’ I was clicking the volume on the phone to make sure I’d heard properly. Mum was trying to explain and I kept cutting her off with questions! She said that Taylor had asked for my number so she could talk through everything about the video, I was like, ‘Don’t ask me! Just get her to text me now!’ When Taylor called, she said, ‘Thank you so much for saying you’ll do it’ and I replied, ‘Come on! Anything! I’m there!’ But it just shows that huge pop stars or actors or actresses can still have that humility, which is so inspiring. A lot of people, as they get bigger, they lose that, so it’s really cool to see someone leading by example. Especially for young girls.”

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After s2 of Empire premiered on Fox, Taylor and Serayah haven’t been seen together ever since August 2015. So much for this friendship huh?

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Well, that was a short “friendship” wasn’t it? Lol. Tomorrow, tune in to see me talk about Taylor and Gigi Hadid. In the meantime, I’d like to apologize again for the late post and as a present, I’m gonna post the Gigi one early! Goodbye everyone!

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