Beardchella Recap

Here, here! Bitches, it’s finally here! Beardchella finally happened and it was a hot mess as usual. Tay came as expected (she’s so fucking predictable it’s not even funny anymore), she invited her faux friends (so that it doesn’t look like she’s the lonely cunt she really is) and ofc she danced awkwardly and crazily at her beard Calvin’s show (like she even enjoys his music lol). Let me recap everything for you:

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On April 16th, Tay was spotted with her faux friends Lorde, Martha Hunt, Jack Antonoff, Haim and Serayah:

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I LOVE HOW IN A LOT OF THESE PICS THEY’RE BARELY SMILING WITH TAY LOL

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Also, at the festival Tay’s special friend Karlie Kloss were also there but not seen with Taylor:

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WTF IS SHE WEARING OMFG

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Tay’s other fake friend Alessandra Ambrosio was also seen at Coachella too, but not with Tay lol:

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THIS FESTIVAL SHOULD REALLY BE CALLED TRASHCELLA WITH ALL THE OUTFITS I’VE BEEN SEEING HAHA

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Oh, and on Jack, Lorde, Haim, Serayah and Martha hanging out with Tay:

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Funny how Jack is hanging out with Tay a month after this was announced:

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Lorde, we already know why you’re hanging out with Tay:

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Haim, we all know you need the publicity, because:

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And Martha, you haven’t even hungout with Tay since August 2015 and this just came out so:

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BTW, I ALSO FIND IT FUNNY HOW MARTHA WAS WEARING A BRALETTE AT BEARDCHELLA

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Anyway, Serayah oh dear you’re just getting more pathetic with these PR stunts:

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Now onto April 17th, Taylor was spotted with one of her newest faux friends: Kennedy Raye:

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TAY DOES NOT KNOW HOW TO DRESS FOR BEARDCHELLA LIKE SERIOUSLY HAHA

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I found Kennedy’s Instagram and this is what I found out about her:

She’s a “creative director” and actress even though she doesn’t have an IMDB lol:

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And, she’s fake friends with Serayah:

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BY THE WAY, LOL AT TAY TRYING TO FIND ANOTHER TOKEN BLACK FRIEND WE ALL KNOW SHE’S STILL TRYING TO HIDE HER RACIST SIDE

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Anyway, moving onto Camila the cunt:

Resident 5H racist Camila Camila decided to stalk Tay and went to Beardchella to teach her faux friends a stupid dance lol

 

 

Dance rehearsals 💃🏼💃🏼 @marhunt @kennedyrayee @camila_cabello @taylorswift

A post shared by SERAYAH (@serayah) on

OH DEAR ARE THEY DOING THE DISCOUNT HARLEM SHAKE LMFAO

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Oh, and how funny how Camila is hanging out with Tay a month before this album comes out:

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Moreover, the next day is the day we’ve all been waiting for: Calvin’s set!

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As I predicted correctly, Tay watched Calvin’s set and pretended to enjoy it lol:

I LOVE HOW SHE’S FILMING HERSELF MORE THAN THE ACTUAL PERFORMANCE

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Also, I love how she’s not in the front watching her “boyfriend”‘s performance or even backstage for him lol:

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That’s it for Beardchella. Hope y’all had a great time reading this recap or going (I bet y’all had a better time there than Tay did haha). Also, I’m surprised Lily and Selena didn’t even go, because that seemed like their type of scene and you know they’re both obsessed with Taylor haha. But, oh gosh I was so right about everything, like I need an award or something lol. But, we’re not done yet with Tay and Cal, she needs him for the Billboard Music Awards (lol at him not getting an award nomination though haha). Bye guys and thank you guys for reading my posts and sending me messages on tumblr!

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