Tay and Cal’s “break-up” party

Good morning bitches. Nat’s back with more news about everyone’s favorite pop star Taylor Swift. Today is a day of celebration, because Taylor and Calvin’s contract has finally expired after a year and half of “dating”. In today’s post, I’m going to take you guys on a trip down beard land, as I recap everything that happened in Tay and Cal’s fauxlationship. Let’s get this “break-up” party started shall we:

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Just yesterday it was announced that Tay and her beard Calvin Harris’ contract expired:IMG_1142.PNG

 

This is what their publicists said lol:

“There was no drama,” a source told People. “Things just don’t work out sometimes.”

“This all happened last week,” a source told E! News. “Taylor and [Calvin] had no big blowout fight, but the romance just was not there anymore for them. [He] is the one that ended it. It was all done in a very mature fashion. Taylor is pretty upset but they are still in communication. Taylor was there for [him] with his accident and supportive.”

“They were just not very compatible in different areas in their relationship. The touring and traveling didn’t help. It seemed like they were more friends than lovers,” the source said.

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LIKE SERIOUSLY WHO BOUGHT THIS FAUXLATIONSHIP OMFG

But, let’s take a look back at the most hilarious moments of this fauxlationship shall we:

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From how they met through Tay’s publicist Tree (Go to 2:45 for the hilariousness lol):

To Calvin flat out saying that Taylor wasn’t his type in an interview lol:

To Cal “cat-sitting” Tay’s cats lol:

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To being forced to attend each other’s concerts:

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To being forced to attend award shows together:

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To Tay paying her faux friends to say “great things about” Cal lol:

“He’s a wonderful man,” Jaime King told me at last night’s premiere of the new Christian Dior documentary Dior and I. “He’s a beautiful man.”

Ed Sheeran also recently gave the relationship his “seal of approval.”

“He’s cool,” Sheeran told ZM Online. “He’s a really nice guy, yeah. Really, really nice guy.”

To these hilarious pics:

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To being named highest paid couple (wtf was that lol):

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Tay calling Calvin by his real name at the IHeartRadio Music Awards:

To those embarrassing 1-year fauxversary pics:

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To these ridiculous photo ops:

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And, can we just appreciate that this was their last photo op together like oh gosh haha:

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Also, Aarika Wolf (you know Cal’s ex he was forced to dump for this ridiculous stunt) is probably doing this right now:

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That’s it for the “break-up” post haha. Wow, I never thought that this fauxlationship would top the embarrassment fuckery that was haylor and the Matt Healy fauxlationships, but boy was I wrong lol. I’m just glad it’s over, because those 2 looked like they literally wanted to kill each other towards the end of their fauxlationship. Hey, look at the bright side though: Calvin is finally getting the attention he “deserves”. Let’s see how long it lasts though lol. Also, I wonder who’s next on Tay’s beard quest. Who will be the next victim? Place your bets now by tweeting me @SassyAF28 at Twitter, commenting below my post, or messaging me at exposingtaylorallisonswift.tumblr.com. And, I wonder what their “break-up” single is going to be called? The DJ broke my heart on the dance floor, perhaps? Lol. Bye guys and I’ll be back with more Tay news soon!

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