Tay and Tom’s latest beard adventure

Rise and shine bitches. It’s the time for me to tell you about everyone’s favorite spoiled brat Taylor Swift. Today in her spoiled brat adventures, I’m gonna talk about her latest beard night, I mean her latest date night with her beard, I mean, “boyfriend” Tom Hiddleston. Let me tell you all about the bullshit:

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On Wednesday June 15th, US Weekly reportedly spotted Tay and Tom on a date night:

“Tom and Taylor were … in the back left booth drinking white wine,” an eyewitness tells Us Weekly. “They were very cute, a lot of laughing, giggling, as she showed him texts and photos on her phone.”

The pair couldn’t keep their hands off each other either. “They were interlacing their fingers across the table and laughing,” the onlooker said, noting that they ordered the restaurant’s famous Avondale Swan pastry with whipped cream and fudge. The “Wildest Dreams” songstress, 26, and Avengers actor, 35, stayed at the restaurant for more than two and a half hours, the eyewitness adds. They even ordered after-dinner espressos and lingered past 11:30 p.m.

WTF WHO DRINKS ESPRESSOS AFTER DRINKING WINE LIKE WHAT KIND OF TRANSITION IS THAT LOL

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Also, where the hell are the pics of this supposed date US Weekly? Like, were you guys paid to write this bullshit fanfic story or what?

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That’s it for the bullshit date story. Oh gosh, like seriously, Taylor & Tom’s teams, if you’re going to have an “actual” date: CALL THE PAPS & MAKE THEM GO THERE TO THE ACTUAL FUCKING PLACE. Don’t just let the writer describe it in the article, show us actual evidence of this supposed “date”. Everyone already knows you guys are in a fauxlationship, try to prove us wrong with more terrible photo ops already! Gosh, I could organize a better fauxlationship than you idiots. Sorry, got a bit ranty there lol. Goodbye guys, have fun trying to endure the bullshit they’re trying to sell you and message me on exposingtaylorallisonswift.tumblr if you would like to voice your opinion on this fauxlationship. Good day everyone!

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